The Meaning of Liff

Posted on by The Old Wolf

I first saw this gem in hardback in a shop in Oslo, and figured it would be online.

The Meaning of Liff by Douglas Adams and John Lloyd.

Not only the words are delightful, but the fact that they are so in touch with all these little scraps of life that hardly anyone ever talks about… There’s an expanded version also, but it doesn’t appear to have made it online yet.

A few examples:

LINDISFARNE (adj.)
Descriptive of the pleasant smell of an empty biscuit tin.

MALIBU (n.)
The height by which the top of a wave exceeds the height to which you have rolled up your trousers.

YEPPOON (n.)
One of the hat-hanging corks which Australians wear for making Qantas commercials.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

My favorite farewell speech.

Posted on by The Old Wolf

“I am leaving soon and you’ll forgive me if I speak bluntly. The universe grows smaller every day and the threat of aggression by any group anywhere can no longer be tolerated. There must be security for all or no one is secure. Now this does not mean giving up any freedom, except the freedom to act irresponsibly. Your ancestors knew this when they made laws to govern themselves and hired policemen to enforce them. We, of the other planets, have long accepted this principle. We have an organization for the mutual protection of all planets and for the complete elimination of aggression. The test of any such higher authority is, of course, the police force that supports it. For our policemen we created a race of robots. Their function is to patrol the planets in spaceships like this one and preserve the peace. In matters of aggression we have given them absolute power over us. This power cannot be revoked. A t the first signs of violence they act automatically against the aggressor. The penalty for provoking their action is too terrible to risk. The result is we live in peace without arms or armies, secure in the knowledge that we are free from aggression and war, free to pursue more profitable enterprises. Now, we do not pretend to have achieved perfection, but we do have a system, and it works. I came here to give you these facts. It is no concern of ours how you run your own planet, but if you threaten to extend your violence, this Earth of yours will be reduced to a burned-out cinder. Your choice is simple: join us and live in peace, or pursue your present course and face obliteration. We shall be waiting for your answer. The decision rests with you.”

-Klaatu, “The Day the Earth Stood Still”

When the earth moves

Posted on by The Old Wolf

We expect the ground under our feet to stay in one place. We like terra firma – and as Larry Fine said, “the more firma, the less terra.”

Earthquakes and landslides defy that expectation, and as a result can be some of the most disturbing experiences.

On February 15, 2010, after a long period of heavy rains, a hillside in Maierato, Calabria, Italy simply let go, and gracefully slid into the valley below. It looked more like a river than a solid land mass.

The Italian news outlet had this to say about the event:

“A mass evacuation took place in Maierato, a village of 2300 inhabitants in the province of Vibo Valentia, on Monday where an entire mountainside near the center of town collapsed, endangering houses. The first 300 people were evacuated from their homes as early as Monday evening and Tuesday morning the evacuation of the entire surrounding area was begun. More than 200 people have been placed in the police school of Vibo. Another ninety people will be placed in the sports hall of Vibo. Others will be brought into the sports hall of Monte Poro which can accommodate 400 to 500 people, but many of the evacuees have already found refuge in the homes of relatives and friends.

Tons of earth now cover what until recently was a valley. The ridge has brushed dozens of dwellings, putting at risk the buildings that are located at the top which may slip down if the landslide continues to move. This is a significant risk, as it has started to rain with some insistence. The landslide has a front a couple of miles wide, and has swept away roads and water lines, so that the region is completely deprived of water.”

Il vecchio lupo ha parlato.

His Master’s Voice Silenced

Posted on by The Old Wolf
On January 15, HMV plc entered receivership, and the hmv.com website displayed a simple legal notice. Stores in Ireland were shuttered.
Several views of His Master’s Voice/HMV in Oxford Street, London, in the 1960’s.

The Wikipedia entry on HMV

Found at Glaserei

The original painting of Nipper by Francis Barraud; the trademark used by Victor (later RCA Victor) and HMV substituted a disc gramophone for the wax-cylinder machine.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

 

Rocky Homes

Posted on by The Old Wolf

“The tiny Brittany town of Plougrescant’s claim to fame is a puzzling little house situated between two granite rocks by the sea.

The residence, Castel Meur, was built in 1861 with a specific goal in mind — to ward off the destructive heavy winds and storms the area is often troubled by.

After a postcard of the property created to boost local tourism caused such a stir with tourists that the private residence suffered damage, visitors can now only admire its unique form from a distance.”

(Found at CNN)

CastelMeur

Another home in the Fafe mountains of Portugal is even more offbeat, “a Casa do Penedo” (House of the Rock)

houseportugal

Photographs above and below by Feliciano Guimarães

houseportugalby

An article about the home, including a video tour of the interior (in Portugese) can be found here.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

You can’t discuss it, but I can.

Posted on by The Old Wolf

From MSN News:

Kindergartner suspended for comment on toy bubble gun

MOUNT CARMEL, Pa. — A 5-year-old Pennsylvania girl who told another girl she was going to shoot her with a pink toy gun that blows soapy bubbles has been suspended from kindergarten.

Her family has hired an attorney to fight the punishment, which initially was 10 days but was reduced to two.

Attorney Robin Ficker says Mount Carmel Area School District officials labeled the girl a “terrorist threat” for the bubble gun remark, made Jan. 10 as both girls waited for a school bus.

Ficker says the girl didn’t even have the bubble gun with her and has never fired a real gun. He says she’s “the least terroristic person in Pennsylvania.”

School district solicitor Edward Greco tells pennlive.com that officials are looking into the case. He said school officials aren’t at liberty to discuss disciplinary actions.

You aren’t at liberty to discuss disciplinary actions, but I am.

You are douchebags.

Idiots.

Paranoid schizophrenics with delusions of relevance.

For your gratuitous information: A child of 5 has no conception of reality when it comes to gun violence. They play with water guns and bubble guns and toy guns and parrot what they see on television. They have no idea what a real weapon can do to a human body. They play.

When reasonable adults hear a child of that age say something inappropriate, they take them aside and explain it. They offer benefits and consequences. Maybe she loses recess and goes home with a note pinned to her jacket.

But you don’t sodding call her a terrorist and suspend her from school for ten days, you asswaffles!

You blistering simpletons, you have done more to warp that little girl’s world view than anything she might have seen on television. She will never forget this event, and it is likely that she will never understand why such a firestorm of stupidity ignited around her. She will only know subconsciously that she did something horribly wrong. and will never look at another firearm in the same way again, even though carrying a legal one might save her life when she’s older.

Here’s a piece of unsolicited advice: Stick to chasing ambulances, and leave 5-year-old girls alone. Better yet, find a profession far, far away from people, where you can do no more damage with your pompous self-importance.

The Old Wolf has discussed.

The Trautonium

Posted on by The Old Wolf

Oskar Sala (1910-2002) was a German composer. Paul Hindemith, Sala’s composition professor at the Berlin Academy of Music, introduced his student in 1930 to the engineer Friedrich Trautwein. Together they developed the Trautonium, one of the first electronic instruments. Its development paralleled the thermin and was a precursor to the synthesizer, resulting in a device that lets you mimic not only traditional musical instruments, but can produce voices, animal sounds and synthesized sounds (subharmonics).

In this video, Oskar Sala gives a demonstration of the Trautonium in the Hague. The body of the instrument is similar to that of a pipe organ, having two ‘manuals’ that are played with the fingers, although the normal configuration of black and white keys is missing. Mr. Zaun, a German, gives an introduction, and Sala is accompanied by a pianist as he plays the Trautonium.

The Old Wolf has spoken.