I grew up loving comics and cartoons, beginning with Peanuts and the New Yorker in the 50’s; I never grew out of them, and over the years have collected a number of “completes” from some of my favorite artists, including Bill Watterson’s “Calvin and Hobbes” and Gary Larson’s “Far Side”. I’d love to own the complete Peanuts collection, but the way it’s being released makes it fearfully expensive.

MAD Magazine’s Don Martin has a complete collection out there, but one notable star is missing: Dave Berg, longtime artist for Mad and author of the popular “Lighter Side of” series.

Mad published a number of Berg collections, but the vast body of his work has never been assembled in one place; I’d like to say that it’s time.

Some hope is on the horizon – it looks like Amazon has gotten wind of a new collection, slated for release some time near the end of 2013:

But I fear it will only be a selection of Dave’s work, chosen by a committee of folks who think this or that is worthy of inclusion. As a reader of Mad since the early 60’s, I’ve probably read most of what Berg published… and I want it all. Still, beggars can’t be choosy; I’ll most likely buy this collection since it’s available, and hope that someday someone else will think it worthwhile to put together a collection of the complete works of this master artist.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Despite the fact that WordPress admins know about the phenomenon of junk followers, they continue to pile up. I now have almost 500 followers of my blog, but from what I’ve been able to determine from poking around, only about 200 of these are real live people who are interested in what I have to say.

The remainder are bot-generated follows, each of which is attached to some spam website or other.

WordPress provides an option for reporting spammed content, which I do every time one of these shows up; an example is user “masoomzaidi” who attached his name to “http://bulkemailcompany.wordpress.com“. You’ll notice that the referenced blog has already been terminated for terms of service violations.

Many of the blogs which have been so spammed have also been terminated, but I really, really hope that WordPress can figure out a comprehensive solution to this; thus far, there is no way to remove unwanted followers or clear out deadwood.

As for people who do this – please know that I hold you in the lowest regard. Behaviour of this nature is on the same level as spam comments in other people’s blogs, and shows that you have the morals and ethics of a honey badger. Obviously your mothers didn’t teach you anything about honesty and decency – or if they did, they would weep bitter tears of shame to know that you are stooping to such ignorant and repugnant strategies to monetize your product or service. Now: put on a dunce cap and go sit in the corner for the rest of the day. Like this:

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Y-chromosomes only need apply.

Found at Retronaut

This letter was a product of its times, rather than any malevolence on the part of Disney as a corporation. I simply found it interesting.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Senate rejects background checks on gun purchases in 54-46 vote

Despite overwhelming support^[1] for universal background checks from the general public, it appears that Pat Oliphaunt’s recent offering was 100% on the mark.

Background checks are not a blanket solution, nor are they a first step towards an outright gun ban as many on the far left would like to see. They are, however, an important part of a comprehensive plan. I am a firm supporter of the second amendment to our Constitution, but unregulated and unrestricted sale of weapons makes no sense; cars must be registered and drivers licensed, and this seems to raise no hackles except at the very fringes of society.

As I posted elsewhere,

The problem of violence in our country has nothing whatever to do with guns, but with a fundamental breakdown of morals (note: not specifically religious, but human, which covers all of humanity) and human kindness. Mental illness, and not just “schizophrenia” or other readily-identifiable maladies, is growing unchecked; schools are breeding grounds for the most horrific kinds of cruelty, exclusion, and prejudice, and most boards, districts, and local administrations continue to turn a blind eye to the problem. Pockets of concerned citizens, parents, teachers, and the occasional anomalous legislator or government official are doing what they can to stem the tide, but without a national sea change, we might as well be piling dry leaves to stop Euroclydon.

With each passing day, I am more and more deeply ashamed of this country’s legislative bodies.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

[1] A CNN/ORC International survey released last week …indicated 86% of the public supports some form of background checks that are not currently required by law for gun sales. 86% of Americans questioned in an ABC News/Washington Post poll released Tuesday said they supported background checks for gun sales on the internet and at gun shows. [source]

It has been reported in a number of places that WordPress is under attack from criminal elements attempting to commandeer WP servers to create a super botnet. Since I use WordPress.com, the only thing I could think to do was to change my own user password to something even stronger than it was, something that would take an average desktop PC 322 septillion years to crack. Even this does not help me rest very easy, because we’ve seen that more powerful computers are being used to crack passwords much more rapidly, and I don’t know how fast a GPU-equipped machine – or a network of them – would be able to get into my individual account.

Of course, if someone manages to compromise the servers at wordpress.com where my acccount resides, the whole issue of my own password strength could be moot.

One other disturbing thing – within the last little while, I’ve had a rash of “followers” show up on my blog. Most of them have empty gravatar profiles, no links, no blogs, or are from strange countries like Haiti or Malaysia, places where I would not expect people to take an interest in what I write. Could these followers be related to what’s going on with WordPress? Or is this a devious new way to get linkbacks, akin to comment spam?

I wish I knew. Any other WordPress bloggers experiencing things like this?

The Old Wolf is puzzled.

[Edit] It has been pointed out that the list below is somewhat dated. Bostonians, do your duty and come up with a 21-st century version!]

Today Boston needs love. Here are a few reasons to feel good about Beantown. In addition, 29 more reasons can be found at Buzzfeed.

THE WICKED GOOD GUIDE TO BOSTON ENGLISH

             Everybody knows about pahking cahs in Hahvuhd Yahd, but there’s more to the accent than that. In Boston English, “ah” (the one without an R after it) often becomes something closer to “aw”, so that, for example, “tonic” (see below), comes out more like “tawnic” (former Mayor Kevin White would often express outrage by exclaiming “Motha a’Gawd!”). And it’s not just after the A’s that the R’s go away. They disappear after other vowels as well, particularly “ee” sounds, so that one could properly argue that “Reveah is wicked wee‑id” (translation: “Revere is unusual”). But don’t worry about poor lost New England R’s. In typical Yankee fashion, we re‑use ’em ‑‑ by sticking them on the ends of certain other words ending with “uh” sounds: “Ah final ahs just disappeah, but wheah they go we’ve no idear.”

The quickest way to convince a native that you’re just a tourist is to refer to “the PublicGardens” (even if you pronounce it “Public Gahdens”) or “the Boston Commons.” Both are singular (ie., “PublicGarden” and “Boston Common”). Other tips: Tremont is pronounced “Treh‑mont” and it’s COPley, not COPEly, Square (or Squayuh). The pronunciation of many other Massachusetts locations bears little resemblance to their spelling; to avoid the feeling that the natives are snickering at you behind your back, take The Massachusetts Quiz. And now onto the vocabulary…

Barrel

What you deposit trash in.

Bobos

Boat shoes, i.e., Keds.

Breakdown Lane

Highway shoulder. Also, an oxymoron ‑‑ the last place you want to break down in greater Boston is in the breakdown lane, especially during rush hour, when it becomes the high‑speed lane (in some places, even legally).

Bubbler

That’s a water cooler to you, bub.

Candlepins

Boston bowling; involves tiny little pins and tiny little wooden balls (the pins are so hard to hit, you get three tries a frame). Watch “Candlepins for Cash” every Saturday morning, always hosted by some retired/fired sportscaster, like Don Gillis or Bob Gamere.

Carriage

What you use to wheel your groceries around at the Stah Mahket.

Cleanser

Where you bring your clothes to be dry cleaned.

Dot Ave

Dorchester Avenue.

Down

Where somebody is, for example: “They’re down the Cape today.”

Elastic

Rubber band.

Frappe

A milkshake or malted elsewhere, it’s basically ice cream, milk and chocolate syrup blended together. The ‘e’ is silent.

Get on the state

Land a job with the MBTA, MWRA or some other state agency.

Hoodsie

A small cup of ice cream, the kind that comes with a flat wooden spoon.  Sometimes used to refer to certain teen‑aged girls.

Jimmies

Those little chocolate or multi‑colored thingees you ask the guy at the ice‑cream store to put on top of your cone.

Mehfuh

A city next to Sommaville.

Packie

Where you buy liquor (closed on Sundays).

The Pike

The Massachusetts Turnpike. Also, the world’s longest parking lot, at least out by Sturbridge on the day before Thanksgiving.

Plenty a chahm

What all houses for sale have, at least according to the brokers. Really old houses also tend to have “characta,” especially if the roof and floors need to be replaced.

Rat

Young resident of certain neighborhoods, for example: “Rozzie rat” and “Dot rat” (the former being a denizen of Roslindale, the latter of Dorchester). The Back Bay and Beacon Hill do not have rats, at least not of the human variety.

Rozzie

What the natives call Roslindale, Boston’s premier neighborhood. Not to be confused with Southie, Eastie or Westie.

Rotary

A traffic circle. One of Massachusetts’ two main contributions to the art of traffic regulation (the other being the red‑and‑yellow pedestrian‑crossing light).

Saddee

The day after Friday.

Scoop

To kiss: “Guess who I scooped on last night?!?”

Scrod

A small, ambiguous piece of fish that never knows if it’s cod or haddock.^[1]

So don’t I

An example of the Massachusetts negative positive. Used like this: “I just love the food at Kelly’s.” “Oh, so don’t I!”

The show

The movies.

Spa

A luncheonette or ma‑and‑pop convenience store (e.g., the Palace Spa in Brighton) ‑‑ Store 24s are never spas.

Spuckie

Sometimes, spukie. What some Bostonians still call a sub or hero (there’s even a sub shop in Dorchester called Spukies ‘n Pizza). May be limited to Dorchester and Roxbury, although your scribe once heard it in West Roxbury. From spucadella, a type of Italian sandwich roll you can still buy at some of the bakeries in the North End and Somerville.

The T

The Boston subway system. Represents the triumph of fuzzy logic, or something, because it does not actually stand for any single word. Cambridge Seven Associates thought it up in the early 1960s when the state hired them to design graphics for the then new MBTA. Their goal was to come up with something as recognizable as a cross that also evoked the idea of transit, transportation, tunnel, etc.

Time

A party, usually of the political or retirement type: “We’re throwin’ a time for the Dap down at the Eagles. Count you in?”

Tonic

What other people call soda. In some Boston supermarkets, the signs will direct you to the “tonic” and “diet tonic” aisles.

Tookie

Somebody who goes out with a much younger person: “He’s such a tookie! He’s going out with a ten‑year old!!!” See also, “Hoodsie.”

Townie

Often, a resident of Charlestown. But townies also live in Reveah and Whiskey Point (“da Point”) in Brookline, so it’s also a state of mind, or perhaps hair.  You can often tell a townie by the way he or she adds the phrase “‘n shiz” to the end of many sentences, as in “Oh my gawd, like yestihday, right, he was totally down Nahant polishing his TA (Trans Am) ‘n shit.”

Triple decker

Boston’s contribution to architecture ‑‑ a narrow, three‑story house, in which each floor is a separate apartment.

Triple Eagle

Somebody who went to B.C.High School, B.C. and B.C.LawSchool. In some circles, more prestigious than a Hahvihd degree.

Westa Wuhstuh

Terra incognito; beyond the bounds of civilization.

Wicked

A general intensifier: “He’s wicked nuts!”

Wicked Pissa

An expression of high approval.

Wicked f*’ pissa!

Something that’s just absolutely too cool for words.

What’s doin’?

How are you?

Whole ‘notha

A complete replacement; “I got a whole ‘notha computa on my desk now.”

‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑‑

The author of this is originally from New Yawk, so he’s probably missed a word or two. Feel free to correct him on his Boston English, at adamg@world.std.com.  Thanks to all the folks who’ve added to the glossary, in particular Billy Yank and Kirsten Alexander.

[1]An out-of-town businessman grabbed a cab and on the way to his destination asked the cabbie, “Do you know where I can get scrod in this town?” The cabdriver responded, “Ya know, bub, I heah that question a lot. But I’ve nevah heahd anyone use the thahd pahson plupahfect subjunctive befoah…”

The Kerry way walking path between Sneem and Kenmare in Ireland

For the rest, visit myscienceacademy.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

… and casts a β-fireball.

That game is older than we thought.

Egyptian 20-sided die, with greek letters on the faces. 2nd century BC to 4th century AD. At any rate, very, very old.

The Old Wolf has spoken.