I have written before about dealing with scammers on Craigslist, but this vehicle – as well as Facebook Marketplace or local swap/sell groups – is still an effective way to generate some cash for items that one no longer needs.

But above and beyond scams, which seem to surface with just about every ad placed thanks to bots run by the bad guys, there are always challenges to deal with. The series below by Kevin McShane at kevincomics.com is illustrative of some of the things one has to deal with on a regular basis.

The first one (being ghosted) is by far the most common. Hey, if you’re not really interested, why did you ask in the first place? How much energy does it take to just send a courteous message to the seller saying “Thanks for the info, but I’ve changed my mind” or something like that? I cannot tell you how much I appreciate the people who have the decency to do this.

The second one is infuriating. Sometimes it’s all I can do to refrain from sending back (in all caps) “JUST READ THE @#$% POST, YOU BLISTERING SIMPLETON!”

Despite putting in all my posts something like “No holds, no deliveries” I will invariably have someone express interest and then say “Can you deliver to Augusta?” Lazy wanker. Instead of unloading a semi-full of obscene imprecations at them, the Goodwoman of the House suggested replying, “Sure, for an extra $100.00.” That might just get the message across as well.

Then there are the folks who will say, “I want this but I won’t get paid until Friday, can you hold it for me?” I’ve been stung far too often by this, because Friday comes and either they ghost me (#1 above) or come back with “Hey I changed my mind.” In the meantime, I could have sold it three times over and by now the other buyers have moved on. So I don’t do that any longer. If you want me to hold something, you can pay me with PayPal or one of the other cash apps, and then I’ll hold it until Friday.

The kind of person who is too lazy to bargain is always a burr under my saddle. Just sending a message saying “bottom dollar price” or “what’s the lowest you’ll take” or “will you take less” is a dick move. No, I’m not going to put in your work for you, dipweeds. Make me an offer and I’ll either accept it or counter. And if I counter and you don’t move at all, I’m not likely to sell it to you. This is how dickering works. If you don’t do this, you’re more interested in “winning” than in getting an item for a good price.

[When we sold our first home in 1980, my first wife and I listed it for a very fair price given the work we had put in to improve it. We had a guy come in and say outright, “I’m the kind of guy who is used to getting what I want” and offering us $500 less on a $49,000 home. (I know, I know, prices today are insane, but at that time it was a good deal on an 800 ft² home.) Clearly it wasn’t about the money, it was about winning, and if he hadn’t said that I might have been just fine with a bit of wiggle room. We took the offer because we were in a difficult situation, but I wish I had been able to tell him to shove his offer where the sun doesn’t shine; pay our asking price or buy something else. The smug grin on his face still raises my blood pressure when I think of it 40 years later. Up yours, Monty.]

As for the last one, I’m not your therapist, buddy. Leave the story out and just cut to the chase. Can you pick it up today or not?

Like I said, online selling can be very productive, but dealing with idiots definitely raises the blood pressure. It makes me have even more respect for retail workers, who doubtless have to put up with similar nonsense many times every day.

The Old Wolf has spoken.