Against all enemies, foreign and domestic.

This past Thursday I had the honor of attending a naturalization ceremony for some friends of mine. Originally from the UK, they’ve been in the US for around 10 years or so with a green card, and last February they initiated the process for becoming a citizen. It was expensive, tortuous and byzantine, and they had to deal with the best and the worst of American career bureaucrats, but they persevered, and on Thursday they were sworn in as United States Citizens.

Despite being born of immigrant ancestors, this was the first time I have ever attended such a ceremony. It brought many feelings to the surface. My own paternal grandparents came to this country in around 1900 from Calabria and Tuscany, both in Italy. At some point they were naturalized, but I have no documentation; however, my grandfather’s brother became a citizen on October 2nd, 1925, and I managed to score a copy of his naturalization certificate:

Rafaelle Naturalization Certificate

 

The ceremony was solemn in nature, being an official session of court presided over by a federal judge, and was held in Abravanel Hall in Salt Lake City.

Oath

 

Colors were posted, the Pledge of Allegiance was said, dignitaries spoke, and in the end, a court official administered the following oath to over 400 newly-minted Americans:

“I hereby declare, on oath, that I absolutely and entirely renounce and abjure all allegiance and fidelity to any foreign prince, potentate, state or sovereignty, of whom or which I have heretofore been a subject or citizen; that I will support and defend the Constitution and laws of the United States of America against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I will bear arms on behalf of the United States when required by the law; that I will perform noncombatant service in the armed forces of the United States when required by the law; that I will perform work of national importance under civilian direction when required by the law; and that I take this obligation freely without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; so help me God.”

Citing-Danger-Schumer-Calls-for-Scrapping-New-Screening-Plan-for-Statue-of-Liberty

This process takes place every other month in Salt Lake… and is repeated on a regular basis in countless cities throughout the country.  Thousands of people who saw the lamp lifted beside the golden door, and came here searching for a better life than the ones they had in their countries of birth. Despite all its flaws and challenges and mistakes and foibles and inconsistencies, they wanted to be a part of this country and the ideals that it still, at some level, stands for: freedom, a vote, and the opportunity to do with their lives what they will. At the end of the ceremony, microphones were passed to a few of the new citizens, and they expressed their feelings; the speakers came from Egypt, Mexico, Guatemala, Russia, Congo, Pakistan, Mongolia, the United Kingdom, and over 30 other nations were represented in the body of applicants. Each one expressed gratitude for their newly-conferred freedoms, and the fact that even though they were the nation’s newest citizens, they were in every respect equal to those who lived here since 1776.

It was an odd mixture of feelings. The ceremony was designed to be patriotic in nature, but patriotism seemed out of place in that gathering – it was more a coming home. I reflected on my own immigrant ancestors, and millions like them who left their natal shores to embark on often perilous journeys to an unknown land, a land about which they knew little other than stories. They came, and were processed through Ellis Island and other centers on other shores. They lived, worked, and died, and in so doing they became a part of this country and its history.

Now we are faced with another immigrant question – the fate of 11 million immigrants who came to this country another way, through porous borders. Often their journey was no less perilous, and often moreso – many have died in the attempt. Their reasons for coming have been no less elevated – they sought a better life in a country of opportunity when their own country offered them nothing but poverty, or oppression, or death. But they didn’t come through Ellis Island, and they didn’t follow the rules. And now we have to figure out what is to be done with them, and their families, some of whom have been here for multiple generations.

veggie

If we as Americans want to continue enjoying cheap, abundant produce, we need these laborers – and this is only one small sector of our economy where immigrants figure significantly. But if we are to honor the dedication and sacrifice of those who entered our country and came through the front door, as did my ancestors, as did my friends last Thursday, providing a streamlined path to citizenship for those who did not follow the laws seems like an intolerable slap in the face. For these people there must be a path to citizenship provided, but not one that disrespects those who came here and became citizens under due process of law. Quoting Rep. Jason Chaffetz, R-Utah, “There should be a pathway to citizenship – not a special pathway and not no pathway. But there has to be a legal, lawful way to go through this process that works, and right now it doesn’t.”

It is not an easy decision, because we’re dealing with multiple generations of people – many of whom were born in this country. I don’t support blanket amnesty, but I don’t support throwing all these people out on their ear either. We must keep working to find balance between honoring the law and being both human and humane.  The congressional debate continues.

For those who received their naturalization certificates last Thursday, whatever Congress decides will have little impact other than the one that illegal immigrants cause on the overall economy, an economy of which they are now part and parcel as fully-recognized, taxpaying citizens. These I honor especially, for the efforts they made to become part of our nation in the duly appointed way. To these new Americans, I wish all the prosperity and security that they worked so hard to obtain. This is no less than I wish for our undocumented aliens, but I want them to obtain it the same way as my friends and my ancestors did.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

The Marching Morons

Gratefully, I’m not subject to migraines… but things like  the image below, seen today at Facebook, really, really push the envelope.

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The stupid, it burns.

Based on the number of emails of this nature sent to me by well-meaning but reality-challenged friends and relatives, I am almost driven to despair; countless people like this walk around and vote.

When I see things like this, I’m reminded of the story by C.M. Kornbluth that titles this post, as well as his previous story, “The Little Black Bag”; both have long been among my favorites.

I see posts like this and I have to sit back and ask myself if things like this are spread around just for fun, or if people really believe that

  • Such tests are “really hard”
  • Some random cause-effect statement, written by God only knows who, will actually have an effect on their lives.

Sadly, I must conclude that the latter option is closer to the truth. To quote Weird Al Yankovic, in his song “Your Horoscope For Today,”

Now you may find it inconceivable or at the very least a bit unlikely
that the relative position of the planets and the stars could have
a special deep significance or meaning that exclusively applies to only you,
but let me give you my assurance that these forecasts and predictions
are all based on solid, scientific, documented evidence, so you would have
to be some kind of moron not to realize that every single one of them is absolutely true.

As for me,

Gemini
Your birthday party will be ruined once again by your explosive flatulence
Your love life will run into trouble when your fiance hurls a javelin through your chest

Well, if you see it on the internet, it must be right.

Compounding the problem is the fact that when I have pointed my correspondents to places like Snopes, they reply smugly that such websites are written by left-wing pinko radicals, and that surely their Aunt Matilda knows more about such things anyway. I love my friends and family, but sometimes I want to shake them until their teeth rattle.

Batman

If I were king of the universe, this book would be required reading for every child who ever hopes to graduate from high school; in fact, in order to graduate, one would have to demonstrate functional understanding of the principles contained therein.

Now, forward this blog post to 20 of your friends within the next 5 minutes, and you’ll get a big surprise. 50 friends, and you’ll win the lottery. If you don’t recommend it to anyone, your pet goldfish will die today.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

For Colored

6a0112791cb10528a40168ebfe8824970c-800wi

This photo by was originally published by Life magazine on 27 June 1938.  (Click on the picture for a full-size version.)

The original caption that she wrote for the photo was never published:

FOR COLORED sign atop round Coca-Cola sign tacked to a wooden Star of David in front of BOOKER TEA WASHINGTON store effecting a cruel display of racist condescension in the land of segregation.  Location:  Elkridge, MD, US.  Date taken:  1938.

I first saw this photo at The Fascinating Origin of Coca-Cola,[1] and wanted to find out more about the picture, given the odd juxtaposition of Coke, “For Colored,” and a Mogen Dovid (Star of David). A bit of poking around led me to this fascinating post by John Edwin Mason, a photographer and teacher of African history and photography at the University of Virginia who was reasearching Margaret Bourke-White’s life and work.

Additional articles by Mason on the subject of White, photography and racial issues can be found here. These are intriguing reads which shed some additional insight into the nature of photojournalism that one might not pick up just by reading original articles. In a post about the Photography of Segregation, Mason wrote:

But photographers have little control over how people interpret their photos, even with the most rigorous captioning.  What’s more relevant to this discussion is that Life’sphotographers had almost no control over how their editors used their photos.  Selection, cropping, captioning, context — all of these things were out of the photographers’ hands.  Usually, Life did the photos justice.  Sometimes, it didn’t, and that’s the case here.

I recommend these articles for additional edification about the history of our nation.

The Old Wolf has spoken.


[1] Caveat: The website hosting this article is not known for being especially highbrow. I’ve linked to the article, but I would not recommend drilling down into their other links if you’re interested in family-friendly stuff.

Maintenance: mo’ betta

From: “MONDELLO, DIANE 1” <dmondello1@kleinisd.net>

Subject: MAINTENANCE ROUTINE {NOTIFICATION}

We have re-set our server to serve you more better and consistently;

Please click on HELPDESK or you can copy the link below to re-set your mailbox to the new server:
http://webmaster11.obfuscated.com/

Failure to re-set your mailbox will render your e-mail in-active from
our database.

© Copyright 2013

Webmaster Team
Help Desk Team.


Sounds legit. Just provide all my email account information, and I’m good to go.

Seriously, people – never respond to solicitations like this. Either you’ll be directed to a malware site (read: computer viruses) or you’ll be asked for sensitive personal information.

Be careful out there.

The Old Wolf has spoken.f

Thank heaven one tube will do the trick…

My wife has developed a contact dermatitis around her eyes. It makes her look like she’s got a bad sunburn under the area where a sleep mask would be, and it’s been getting worse for about a month. No idea yet what’s causing it. Her doc thought it was a fungal infection and gave her an antibiotic and a cream  to take, and things just got worse. (That’s why they call it a medical practice, you know? “Hmm, let’s try something else this time.”) Anyway, at least he wised up after the first visit and sent her to a dermatologist. He’s looking at it and saying “contact allergy,” scheduled a patch test for next week and put her on Desoximet 0.25%, a fairly strong topical cortisone cream.

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Now, pay attention – I have pretty good insurance as far as drugs go.

Patient pay for a 60mg tube: $132.94. And without insurance, it would have been $235.00.

Holy flapping scrith. Old_Wolf_OMHI’m of two minds about this.

First off, it took less than a day for this ointment to start bringing the inflammation under control, so It’s pretty effective. I’m not wild about cortisone in general, because it has some fairly ugly side effects when used over a long period of time – I have experience with eczema, and cortisone creams pretty much ruined the skin on my hands; my former partner is an independent Nurse Practitioner, and she’s seen some pretty grim results from long-term cortisone injections. That said, this stuff works and we’re hoping it’s a short term solution.

But Cushlamochree… how could a little bitty tube of mostly inactive base, about the size of a tube of Crest, cost that much? Yas, yas, I know – research, trials, development costs, marketing expenses, and yadda yadda ad infinitum, but I don’t see the justification. It seems all wrong. Thank Mogg’s Holy Grandmother that we don’t have to take Soliris™ at $409,500 per year, or any one of these other nightmare drugs. Prices like that are so wrong that philosophers weep at the thought… it’s just proof positive that our entire medical model is broken at its very foundation.

Like I said… I can’t complain too loudly because at the moment the Goodwoman of the House is getting some much-needed relief, but I think that’s the most expensive prescription I’ve ever encountered, and I’m pretty much gobsmacked.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Stay the hell out of Syria

To whom it may concern in the halls of power:

In 2007, President Obama said the following to the Boston Globe:

“The President does not have power under the Constitution to unilaterally authorize a military attack in a situation that does not involve stopping an actual or imminent threat.”

I share with you here a comment I made elsewhere, but which bears repeating:

It is very hard to express the depth of my feelings about the escalating situation in Syria without resorting to blasphemy and profanity. I remain astonished at the obtuseness and pig-headedness of my legislators and my executive branch. They claim that the populace is demanding action; instead, the populace is demanding jobs, is demanding food, is demanding universal access to healthcare, is demanding that we stop throwing away money on unwinnable conflicts in countries where we don’t belong, for the sole purpose of enriching the oligarchs who are heavily invested in oil companies, security companies, and the military-industrial complex.

The people want peace and prosperity, not frivolous military actions. Surely nobody wants the people of Syria to suffer from the actions of a brutal tyrant, but as a nation we simply don’t have the resources or the moral mandate to play global cop any longer. There’s too much wrong at home, and we can’t afford for the Fed to print more fiat money to finance the insanity. I am ready to march on Washington with pitchfork and torch, if I thought it would do any good.

Let me be clear:

The United Nations has not passed a resolution supporting military action in Syria. I do not support action in Syria, and neither do most Americans.

There is no legitimacy to the mistaken conception that “action is demanded” in Syria. The only people who are demanding action are the ones who stand to profit from it, either financially or politically. I refuse to support the spending of my tax dollars or the creation of artificial money or the incurring of additional debt for fruitless military pursuits that threaten to drag us into yet another interminable conflict,

Stop this madness. I demand better; I demand responsibility and accountability to the American people to whom you are duty bound to answer. None of you have political capital to spend; your reputations and approval ratings are already in the toilet. For the love of whatever you consider holy, be it gods or humanity – do not pull the chain.

stf164_mob

To the lords of the castle: you are getting closer to this every day. Do not test the patience of the American people.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Iconic Brands by State

We’ve seen basketball and we’ve seen football… now a map showing each state’s most iconic brand. (Click for a full-size version)

Brands

I certainly agree with the choice for Utah; Arctic Circle is known for being one of the first (if not the first) mass distributor of Fry Sauce. One of our 2002 Olympic Pins (several, actually) paid homage to this delicacy:

Fry  Fry2

And as a local alternative to the large national chains, I’ve always enjoyed their fare.

I found the list over at Thrillist; click through for some information behind the choices for each state.

As a gratuitous piece of extra information, most folks don’t know that although Harlan Sanders began his business in Kentucky, the world’s first KFC franchise was opened by restaurateur Pete Harman in Salt Lake City – the first KFC franchise was opened at 3900 South State Street and remains there to this day:

Harman

 

As an item of curiosity, it appears that Google uses a certain amount of automated facial recognition on their street view images to protect privacy, which sometimes yields amusing results:

Blur

The Old Wolf has spoken.