This lovely bit of forwarded whimsy reached my inbox in 1999, but I suspect it was written earlier and probably passed around by fax machine. I have been unable to identify the original author; if anyone can identify the writer, I will happily add correct attribution. But in today’s climate of political and pandemic upheaval, I thought this was worth sharing again.
I am hereby officially tendering my resignation as an adult.
I have decided I would like to accept the responsibilities of a 5 year old again. I want to go to McDonald’s and think that it’s a four star restaurant. I want to sail sticks across a fresh mud puddle and make ripples in a pond with rocks.
I want to think M&Ms are better than money because you can eat them. I want to lie under a big oak tree and watch the ants march up its trunk. I want to run a lemonade stand with my friends on a hot summer’s day.
I want to think a quarter is worth more than a dollar bill cause it’s prettier and weighs more. I want to go fishing and care more about catching the minnows along the shore than the big bass in the lake.
I want to return to a time when life was simple. When all you knew were colors, multiplication tables, and nursery rhymes. When I didn’t know what I know now. When all I knew was to be happy because I was blissfully unaware of all the things that should make me worried.
I want to think the world is fair. I want to think that everyone is honest and good. I want to believe that anything is possible. I want to be oblivious to the complexities of life and be overly excited by the little things again.
I don’t want my day to consist of computer crashes, mountains of paperwork, depressing news, how to survive more days in the month than there is money in the bank, doctor bills, gossip,
illness, and the loss of loved ones.
I want to believe in the power of smiles, hugs, a kind word, truth, dreams, the imagination, Santa, the Tooth Fairy, a kiss that makes a boo‑boo go away, making angels in the snow and that my dad and Superman are the strongest people in the world.
So…..here’s my checkbook and my car‑keys, my credit cards and the bills too, my 401K statements, my stocks & bonds, my collections, my insurance premiums, my job, my house and
mortgage, my e‑mail address, pager, cell phone, computer, and watch. I am officially resigning from adulthood.
And if you want to discuss this with me further, you’ll have to catch me first, cause…
“Tag!”… “You’re it!”
No, I wouldn’t trade my experiences of a lifetime for anything, but it would be nice to be free from some of the stress and hassles of daily life. By the way, if you’ve never seen a lovely German film called “Erleuchtung Garantiert” (Enlightenment Guaranteed), I recommend it.
The Old Wolf has spoken.