Category Archives: Selling it

Forskolin – It sounds vaguely indecent.

Posted on by The Old Wolf

junk

Just got this in my spam box today. It appears that Dr. Oz has now moved from hawking garcinia cambogia to this new garbage, Forskolin. The name sounds thoroughly unsavory for reasons I won’t go into here.

I found a great post over at Science Based Medicine that says many of the things I’d normally post here, so I’ll just refer you to that article, and other posts on the same website are worth reading as well. One good quote I will extract – all of these weight-loss nostrums

“…fit the same pattern: a small grain of plausibility, inadequate research, exaggerated claims, and commercial exploitation. There are always testimonials from people who lost weight, probably because their will to believe in the product encouraged them to try harder to eat less and exercise. But enthusiasms and fads don’t last. A year later, the same people are likely to be on a new bandwagon for a different product. Dr. Oz will never lack for new ideas to bolster his ratings. Enthusiasm for easy solutions and for the next new hope will never flag as long as humans remain human.”

In short, it’s all bulldust. But as network marketers will tell you, health and wellness is a trillion-dollar industry, and everyone is trying to get a slice of that pie. As one associate put it, that business is big enough that it would be sufficient to lick the knife that cut the pie. The sad part is, the pie is a lie. Most of what is hawked and marketed has little or no value. As I mentioned over here, if you want to release weight, eat less, eat better, and exercise more.

As a final note, a couple of rules of thumb regarding spam messages like the one above.

  1. It’s a scam. Legitimate businesses don’t advertise using spam
  2. Never click the link that says “unsubscribe.” You’ve just confirmed to these unethical dipweeds that your email address is real and active. It will be sold to other scumbags, and your level of spam will increase.

Be careful out there.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Clickbait: Deconstructed.

Posted on by The Old Wolf

This delightful Epic News video by Peter and Chris (two Irish gentlemen with sharp wit) deconstructs the nature of clickbait to make it easy to recognize. The video is irreverent and lowbrow, but spot on and hilarious. Watch at your own risk.

For those who want the executive summary:

You usually see a highly-sensational title that completely misrepresents and oversells whatever content there may or may not be.

Take a headline like “19 Reasons Why Young Marlon Brando Will Ruin You For The Rest of the Day.”

What do these headlines even mean?

What follows is a summary of how to generate successful clickbait:

  • Don’t waste your time generating original content.
  • Spend your day lurking on link aggregator sites such as reddit and repackaging other people’s stuff to get maximum shares on social media.
  • Add a ridiculous claim about something that will happen provided you CLICK

1) Take a simple video of a homeless man playing a tin whistle for his dog.

This homeless man’s music (will change your life) / (will restore your faith in humanity) / (will make your jaw drop) / (will shock you)

2) If possible crowbar in gender, race, or social issues to make it more provocative:

This blind homeless man’s amazing music for his terminally-ill (gay) dog will restore your faith in humanity.

3) Remove as much descriptive information as possible from your headline to create what the industry calls “a curiosity gap.” Replace it with Hyperbole. If the reader can tell what the story is about at a glance, you’ve FAILED!

Wow! A Blind, Homeless man Befriended an Old Adorable Lost Dog, and What Happened Next Will Restore Your Faith in Humanity.

4) If possible, turn it into a bogus list somehow. Use age and target demographics for greater impact.

16 reasons why only 90s Kids from England will Keep Calm and Carry On While Understanding Why This Blind Homeless Man and His Full-Blown Dog-AIDS-Infested Best Friend Will Restore your Faith in Humanity and Change Your Life (Forever).

5) Add a hashtag

#jenniferlawrence

If you need good examples of clickbait, toddle over to ClickHole, the Onion’s (semi)-parody website originally designed as a sharp stick in the eye to BuzzFeed and Upworthy, but now taking on all the media without discrimination.

As the presenters say, there’s a place for this kind of bulldust tabloid journalism, because enquiring minds want to know. The problem arises when so-called “real news” outlets try this stuff and are deadly serious about it.

cnn

Now I need to confess that I often scan media outlets and reddit and other sources for things I consider interesting or worthwhile or socially relevant, and share them with my social circles. However, I don’t think I’ve ever asked anyone to “like and share” anything. I’m not a like farmer, it’s a poor way to make money.

The Old Wolf Has Published a Blog Post Accessible from Almost Anywhere in the World, and Reading It Will Change Your Life Forever! #Monsanto

Those dratted robocalls

Posted on by The Old Wolf

Got one today from 906-209-8746, and as usual, no one was there.

I have written about this scam before at “The FTC vs. The Hydra,” but an excellent description of these calls was left at 800notes.com by user NAS about one of those never-sufficiently-to-be-damned “credit card services” calls. It was valuable enough I thought I’d repost it here to give it wider exposure.

Unsolicited/Nuisance/Fraud/SCAM/Prank telephone calls are here to stay.  Robotic calling technology is readily available and unscrupulous people will exploit it.  Get a life and deal with it.

Being on the National Do Not Call Registry will NOT stop these calls.  Most of them come from overseas operations that are spoofing numbers in the United States.  They are outside of US laws and jurisdiction.  Your government is NOT the least bit motivated to protect you from this kind of harassment, either on your land line or cell phone.  The Registry only blocks a very tiny percentage of potential callers.  The legislation was written to protect political interests, not your privacy.  It is basically worthless.

Do not be surprised (or upset) if/when the caller hangs up as soon as you answer.  When your phone rings, they have completed their job.  These callers are NOT interested in talking to you.  They get paid for each phone connection made.  Any engagement of you in conversation takes away from their time to call other numbers.  What they are doing is compiling a list of “live” numbers so they can sell it to other scammers.  They are also looking for “dead” numbers to spoof for their future calls.

A hang-up call can also be an overseas “one ring scam” to get you to call back and sock you with exorbitant international or premium service call fees.  Typically those scams target cell phones, and originate form area codes 242, 246, 264, 268, 284, 345, 441, 473, 649, 664, 758, 767, 784, 809, 829, 849, 868, 876, and 869.  (You don’t have to dial a country code to call these international numbers.)  If you don’t recognize who is calling, forget about it.  Don’t answer.  DO NOT call back, unless you’ve got $20.00 per minute to burn!  If it’s important they’ll leave a message and/or call again.

What can you do?

1) Block the calling number.  Most cell phone service providers (and some cell phones themselves) have blocking services.  Many land line phone providers also have blocking services.  Contact your service provider (cell or land-line) to find out how to do it.  For a nominal one-time investment you can purchase a simple plug-in add-on device that allows you to manually block numbers to your land-line (Google “call blocker”).  Note that these callers don’t use a number very long before they switch to another and hit you again.  Get used to it.  It’s an unadvertised perk of having phone service.

2) If you do answer a call and get a real person talking to you, you have established a “business relationship” which takes you out of any Do Not Call Registry restrictions with them….as if they were abiding by those regulations anyway.  Engage them in non-committal conversation as long as you possibly can.  Act VERY interested.  Mess with their minds.  Give them phony credit card numbers.  Give them fictitious addresses.  Make up names.  Consume as much of their time as you can.  While you are taking up their time they cannot harass someone else, so you are performing a vital civic service.  When they do finally hang up, block their number on your phone.

3) DO NOT call them back!  DO NOT select the button that is supposed to remove you from their database.  These actions only registers your phone number as valid so they can add it to their list to sell to other scammers.  Such action also establishes that you have “done business with them before” which takes you off of the Do Not Call Registry for them….as if they would even consider abiding by the law anyway.

4) Telephone communications are regulated by state and federal governments.  Carry a card with the phone number of your State Attorney General (who has the responsibility of enforcing telecommunications laws).  When you get an unsolicited call tell them that they have caught you on a phone that can’t be used for personal use (or they’ve caught you on your cell) and ask them to call back on a different number.  Give them the Attorney General’s number, hang up, and immediately block their number on your phone.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

To lose weight, take these drops (oh, and eat a 1200 calorie diet…)

Posted on by The Old Wolf

homeopathy-debunked-because-its-just-water

It’s not good medicine for a representative of one nutritional product to bash those who rep for another. In my world of ethics, it’s just not done. As a result, I won’t mention any product names in this post, but I want to make a general comment about the way many weight-loss products are advertised and hyped.

Below you’ll find an example, using a homeopathic product as the teacher in the moment, which claims to flush fat and toxins out of your body.

The product concerned contains a panoply of things like Nux Vomica, Ignatia Amara, and about 8 others at 6x and 12x dilutions; the instructions call for placing 10-15 drops under the tongue three times a day.

Oh, yes… and also to eat a 125o-calorie diet while using the products (which cost $150.00 for a bottle of each).

The science behind homeopathic dilutions guarantees that at dilutions of 6X and 12X, there is virtually *no* active ingredient whatsoever in this product – no molecules are left. The physics of Avogadro’s number is incontrovertible.

If you consider the instructions for use of this product, and completely eliminate any reference to the product being referenced, any patient who faithfully complies with these guidelines will have success with weight loss.

Given the average caloric intake of 2,000 KCal for a female, a 1250 calorie diet will result in consistent weight loss, especially when combined with water intake and regular exercise. This weight loss will occur whether or not the patient

* takes homeopathic drops
* sings an aria from “Aida”
* stands on her head and spits nickels, or
* eats a spoonful of portland cement with each meal.

If you are a person of science and reason, you owe it to yourself to take a hard look at the scientific reality of what is going on with homeopathic or other similar weight-loss products, instead of being dazzled by all the marketing weasel words.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

 

So about that “Complimentary Trip” (Part II)

Posted on by The Old Wolf

Click through for Part I of this travel scam.

So after sending in my certificate to IIG Promotions, including a SASE, we received this from Travel Select Rewards:

“Dear [Recipient]:

Thank you for choosing the Travel Select Rewards 7G.

Enclosed is the Certificate you selected. Please read all the terms and conditions before sending in the Registration Form included in your Certificate. We will not be able to take any calls prior to registering your selected certificate(s). [In other words, we’re not going to help you with this process. If you make the tiniest mistake, you’re screwed.]

IMPORTANT: Depending on the reward you have selected, your Registration Form must be received within 21 days or 30 days from the issue date of your Reward Certificate, or your Reward Certificate is void. Please reference the certificate(s) for clarification of all the terms & conditions and time requirements. Voided certificates will not be acknowledged or returned.

Reward

Here, in full, are the terms & conditions referred to everywhere. My comments are in [brackets and in blue.]

TERMS AND CONDITIONS

You have received an exciting airfare promotional offer. [Note: Unlike the original postcard, this is not a “complimentary vacation.”] Below you will find the terms and conditions regarding this promotional offer. These terms are important to the processing of your reservation. Please carefully read them in their entirety.

[How many people will actually take the time to do this? “I have read and accept the End User License Agreement” is one of the most-frequently told lies on the internet today.]

Description of the Program:

This offer includes round-trip coach airfare departing to and from a major US internaational airport within the continental U.S., Puerto Vallarta or Cancun, Mexico and three days and two nights of standard hotel accommodations for two adults (double occupancy required). Recipient and guest must be 21 years of age or older, be a U.S. citizen and possess a valid driver’s license and a major credit card. A purchase of two additional nights of accommodations at an IIG Promotions approved hotel property will be required if the recipient selects a Mexico destination. [Note: at no time does the “offer” say anywhere that you have won a “free trip.” If you got this certificate as the result of sitting through a high-pressure vacation club presentation, be assured that it is worth precisely $0, and will end up costing you a lot of money.]

Registration Form Requirements:

Log on to http://www.rewardregistrationcenter.com to build your IIG Promotions online profile within 30 days of the issue date of offer. Once your offer is registered, you will be provided a link to your Travel Request Form (TRF) to begin the booking process.

If you do not have internet access, you may complete the attached Registration Form and return the original (NO COPIES) to IIG Promotions. Registration Form must be received within 30 days of the issue date of offer. Once your registration is accepted, a TRF will be emailed to you within 14 business days to begin the booking process. If an email is not provided, a TRF will be mailed to you. [Notice all the time-sensitive dates in this offer. Any delay whatsoever, whether your fault or not, will void the offer.]

A $100 refundable deposit in U.S. Dollars, in the form of a money order or cashier’s check will be required at the time of mailing your TRF. Failure to follow all registration requirements, terms of offer, and deposit not being received in the time frame specified renders offer & certificate void without exception. Mail all correspondence to IIG Promotions, P.O. Box 3479, Lake Havasu City, AZ 86405 [Based on the myriad complaints out there about this outfit, getting any money back from them is either impossible or a nightmare. The fact that they only accept payment in money orders or cashier’s checks is a huge red flag.]

General TRF and Offer Requirements:

  • Three different preferred dates of departure and destinations are required. [They’ll validate the cheapest one for you.]
  • A 60 day minimum advance notice for preferred travel dates is required. [So they can find the cheapest fare.]
  • Preferred travel dates must be in chronological order and be at least 30 days apart.
  • Offer is for double occupancy and both travelers must travel on the same itinerary.
  • Monday or Tuesday departures only [This limits your options significantly. If you didn’t take the time to read these terms and conditions carefully and propose travel dates outside these two days, your entire offer will be voided and the cost will be sky-high.]
  • Refundable deposit will be applied to outstanding travel fees and taxes due at time of booking.
  • Recipient is required to pay all government taxes, carrier/supplier imposed fees, ticketing/servicing fees (approximately $119 to $219 per person) and any upgrades selected at the time of booking. These fees will vary based on the destination and dates selected.
  • Recipient and guest’s base coach airfare (excludes government taxes and carrier-imposed fees) is not to exceed $200 per person. [Note: your base fare can’t be more than $200.00, but taxes and fees will most likely be at least $219 per person. This is hardly what classifies as a “deal” in anyone’s book. In the end, you will end up paying almost as much or more for a trip than if you had booked it yourself online using a travel aggregator and looking for your own deals.]
  • Payment must be made using a major credit card; payment cannot be refunded after travel is confirmed. [This makes it impossible for you to get your funds back if anything goes sideways.]
  • Departure and arrival destinations are restricted to IIG approved international airports. [But they don’t tell you which ones those are before you send in your $100 deposit.]
  • Hotel accomodations are at one of hundreds of nationally known hotels in our system such as Intercontinental, Choice, Wyndham, and other hotel affiliates.
  • Only one offer per household will be issued during the promotional offer time period and all travel must be completed within 12 months from your issue date.

Correspondence:

To keep offer from becoming invalid, all correspondence is time sensitive and needs to be returned by mail in the designated time frames. [If you don’t, the whole ball of wax is void.] You will receive a written confirmation with directions and check-in times (if applicable) by mail or email about two weeks prior to your departure date and only after your vacation has been paid in full for any outstanding governmental taxes, service fees and or additional travel services if ordered through IIG Promotions. It is important that you do not leave for your getaway vacation until you have received written confirmation. IIG will not be responsible for travel arrangements made prior to the confirmation of your trip.

Miscellaneous:

Request for travel dates, cities, ports of departure, travel itineraries and airport offerings outside what is allowed in this promotional offer will result in your travel becoming a discounted trip. [The price of that discounted trip will be astronomical. Have a look at some of the complaints.] Once reservation is booked, failure to show for hotel reservations will result in recipient being charged the full retail value of offer [guaranteed to be some astronomical random number.] Some destinations may be considered high demand year round. This offer is valid for weekday travel during low season with year round usage when available for a surcharge [guaranteed to be astronomical.] During high season, special events, weekends, conventions, holiday and peak travel periods a surcharge [guaranteed to be astronomical] will apply, when available. Holidays and Peak Travel Periods are defined as one full week before, during or after any major government holiday or during the months of March, June, July and August. Non-stop flights, class of service of accommodations, length of getaway not covered in offer are available upon request and require an upgrade fee [guaranteed to be astronomical.] Primary certificate holder must make deposit payment. [If someone else pays the deposit, the offer is void, and good luck getting that money back.] All travel components are restricted to Published and Tariff fares. All travel components are subject to IIG’s promotional availability and booked at IIG’s sole discretion. IIG reserves the right to substitute offer components without notice. This offer does not include the cost for additional guests, extra nights and upgrades or any type of incidental expenses such as but not limited to food, beverages, hotel amenity/resort fees, government taxes, gratuities, travel insurance, and service charges, Sorry, no pets. IIG is not responsible for travel suppliers schedule changes. IIG will make every effort to accommodate your preferred travel date(s) but has the right to add, delete or substitute travel dates, resort, hotel and or destinations. IIG has the option to substitute another promotional travel offer of equal or greater value if this offer becomes unavailable.

Refund/Cancellation Policy:

If a need arises to change travel or services booked, all reservations are final and non-refundable. [Sorry, you’re screwed again.] Cancellation Policy – Cancellation penalties apply and certificate will be ineligible for future use. [Good luck getting any of your money back, sucker.] Confirmed reservations may be changed based on travel supplier policy and at IIG Promotions sole discretion, a minimum fee of $25 applies [but you can be sure it will be a lot more] and is the sole responsibility of the recipient. Should you need to cancel your reservations, prior to being booked, IIG Promotions must receive written notice 30 days prior to the expiration of your travel offer. Cancellation must be sent U.S. Certified mail to: IIG Promotions, P.O. Box 3479, Lake Havasu City, AZ 86405

Limit on Redemptions:

Failure to adhere to the terms and conditions outlined in this offer or appear on a confirmed reservation, late correspondence, submission of an incomplete Registration and or Travel Request Form, will result in forfeiture of offer and wil not be acknowledged or returned. Reissue Policy – IIG Promotions does not assume any liability or responsibility for lost or stolen certificates. [This clause is the biggest loophole of all. If you make a single mistake anywhere along the byzantine booking/redemption process, your offer goes up in smoke, and they don’t even have to tell you about it. Your deposit, were you foolish enough to send one in, vanishes like the dew under a desert sun.]

Non-transferable: No Cash Value:

[Brother, they got that one right.] This offer is non-transferable and cannot be sold or redeemed for cash, nor shall any rebates, refunds or credits be issued for any unused time, day (s) or space. This offer is not valid in conjunction with any other discount or promotional offer, nor is it valid for use with group travel. A group is considered two (2) or more families traveling together or meeting at the same destination with the same arrival date.

Limitation of Liability:

This offer us void where prohibited by law. IIG Promotions reserves the right to substitute the components of the offered vacation and varied itinerary with equal or greater value without verbal or written notification should circumstances so require. [Don’t ask, we won’t tell.] IIG Promotions does not assume any liability for damage, expense, or inconvenience, nor for any loss, injury or death or damge to any person or property at any hotel or on any aircraft/ship, or in transit to or from said hotel/aircraft/ship or for any cause whatsoever due to delays, cancellation due to nature, mechanical breakdown, strikes, or acts of God. All federal, state and local laws apply. IIG Promotions assumes no responsibility for any promises or claims, written or verbal made by anyone, other than those made in the terms and conditions provided herein. [In other words, if the pitchman you talked to promised you anything at all, if it’s not in this contract, you’re out of luck.] This is a promotional offer [note: not a “prize” or a “free vacation”] and is not to be sold to the end user without prior written consent from IIG Promotions. This offer is not to be used as an employee incentive, by any affiliate of IIG Promotions or the sponsor’s affiliate. The offer is null and void if it is used incorrectly [that’s a huge loophole]. In the event of any mediation, arbitration or litigation relating to this Agreement, the parties (1) agree to the exclusive personal jurisdiction of the state courts located in Mohave County, Arizona and the federal courts located in Phoenix, Arizona, and (2) waive any claim of inconvenient forum. [If you don’t like using our bought-and-paid-for justice system, tough luck.]

You may cancel this contract without penalty or obligation within 30 days from the date of purchase or receipt of the vacation offer/certificate, whichever occurs later. You may also cancel this contract if accomodations or facilities are not available purusant to a request for use as provided in the contract. If you decide to cancel, you must notify the seller in writing of your intent to cancel by returning the certificate and sending notice to IIG Promotions, P.O. Box 3479, Lake Havasu City, AZ 86405. IIG Promotions is registered with the State of Florida as a Seller of Travel. Registration No. 37367. [Note: this whole scheme is a devious way of selling you an overpriced trip unter the thinly-veiled guise of an “exciting offer.” Remember: you get what you pay for, and TANSTAAFL.]¹ No person should rely upon reprentations other than thoe included in these terms & conditions. [Read: We know that our salesmen out there are going to lie through their teeth to you, and we take no responsibility for anything they say.] This contract is for the purchase [Note: “purchase,” not “reward.”] of a vacation certificate and puts all assignees on notice of the consumer’s right to cancel under section 559.933, Florida Statutes. California Seller of Travel Registration No. 2093731-50.

To streamline the process, we will not be able to handle any phone calls prior to receiving your registration form. [This is repeated multiple times. They don’t want to talk to you or explain anything. If you make a mistake, it voids your certificate and “offer.”

TL;DR – This is not an award or a complimentary trip. It’s an offer to sell you travel, and a very deviously-designed one at that. You think you’re getting a deal, but in the end it’s almost a guarantee that it will cost you more than if you had booked the travel yourself (assuming you did good research.) The people who operate this company and their attorneys must have been pimps and pedophiles in a previous life.

At any rate, I went to the website² and registered as requested. I was promised an email with further details in return. Stand by for Part III.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

¹There Ain’t No Such Thing As A Free Lunch

² Just for yucks and giggles, the additional Terms and Conditions on the Website (which didn’t display properly, by the way – I had to “view source” on that page to see them) are below:

Acceptance of Terms of Use. This Web site and the services offered on it (the “Service”) are owned and operated by Infinity Travel. The Service is provided to you pursuant to the terms and conditions of this Terms of Use and any operating rules or policies that may be published by Infinity Travel (including the Privacy Policy), as may be amended from time to time (collectively, the “Agreements”). You shall mean you, any invitee of yours, and anyone who may receive a gift or credit from you which is redeemable by using the Service. BY USING THE SERVICE, YOU ARE INDICATING YOUR AGREEMENT TO BE BOUND BY ALL OF THE TERMS AND CONDITIONS CONTAINED IN THE AGREEMENTS. User Responsibilities. By consenting to the Agreements, you agree: To represent only yourself on the Service, and no other persons, living, dead, or imagined; the Service may only be used by natural persons (i.e., individuals) on their own behalf and not by or on behalf of any commercial entity unless explicitly permitted by Infinity Travel; To provide accurate information to Infinity Travel, including, but not limited to information required to register with the Service; To not use the Service to: Reproduce, duplicate, copy, sell, resell, distribute, publish or exploit for any commercial purpose the software, products, or services provided by Infinity Travel or obtained through the Service without obtaining the express, prior written consent of Infinity Travel. This restriction includes any attempt to incorporate any information from the provide for your own access to the Service, including but not limited to obtaining and maintaining all telephone, computer hardware and software, and other equipment and paying all related charges. Privacy. As part of the Service registration process, you will provide certain personal information to Infinity Travel. Your personal information will only be used in accordance with Infinity Travel’s Privacy Policy. Infinity Travel reserves the right to, but is not obligated to, inform you by email of changes or additions to the Service or of any Infinity Travel related products and services. Vendors and Goods and Services Infinity Travel and your organization will not be liable for any loss or damage incurred as a result of any interaction between you and a vendor accessible through the Service. All matters, including but not limited to delivery of goods and services, returns, and warranties are solely and strictly between you and the vendor. You acknowledge that Infinity Travel and your organization do not endorse or warrant the vendors that are accessible through the Service nor the goods and services that they provide. In the event of any mediation, arbitration or litigation relating to this Agreement, the parties (1) agree to the exclusive personal jurisdiction of the state courts located in Mohave County, Arizona and the federal courts located in Phoenix, Arizona, and (2) waive any claim of inconvenient forum.

“We have been selected” (A come-on from Save On Resorts)

Posted on by The Old Wolf

Last week we got a postcard in the mail (I should have thought to scan it, but didn’t realize I’d be writing about it until after the fact.) It had a big picture on the front of a Southwest Airlines jet, and the name “Southwest Airlines” emblazoned across it.

Southwest-Airlines-logo

The back indicated that we had “been selected” to receive two round-trip airfare tickets to anywhere in the continental USA and two nights’ accomodation at the selected destination. A number to call was provided. In tiny print on the back was the disclaimer that all promotions were offered and redeemed by a third-party and were not endorsed by Southwest.

I’ve done this before, so we said “what the heck.” I called the number, and was a few qualifying questions:

  • Was I married?
  • Was I between the ages of 28 and 72?
  • Was our combined annual income over $60,000 per year?

Obviously, they’re pitching to stable, wealthy individuals. The last one of these I got I told them that my income was not quite high enough, just to see what happened, and they told me that they were so sorry, I didn’t qualify for this promotion, but sent me off on a wild goose chase to claim another booby prize which – in the end – was worth precisely squat.

So we set up an appointment, and yesterday my wife and I spent three hours listening to the pitch. We had both experienced timeshare presentations before (the telephone receptionist swore up and down that “this is in no way a timeshare presentation”) and were used to high-pressure tactics, so we thought it might be entertaining. We had lunch at a great Thai restaurant before going down, so the day would not be a total loss whatever the outcome.

The room was set up for four couples. Everyone was friendly and courteous. The slideshow lasted about an hour. The essence of the pitch was as follows:

  • Platinum Unlimited Membership
    • Resorts, houses, Condo’s (sic)
    • Hotels, B&B’s
    • All-inclusive (whatever that means)
    • Packages/Cruises
    • All Inclusive’ (sic)
    • Tours/Excursions, Tickets
    • Reward credits (Something about bonuses being refunded to us)
    • Restaurant Discounts
    • Airfare/Car Rental
    • Family Plan (other family members can use our plan, like at Costco)
    • Guest policy
  • 20 year product $2,999
  • Lifetime product $4,999
  • $149.00 “processing fee”
  • $199.00/year annual dues (payable only during years one uses the product)
  • Special bonus for “retired people”: $1,999 for the 20 year Platinum plan, but valid only now, Now, NOW! If you want to think about it, the price will be $4,999.00.
  • “You’re going to be traveling “anyway,” so you might as well be saving money with this plan.”  The concept of “anyway money” is a big part of timeshare pitches, based on the ones I’ve attended. The trouble is, the numbers never add up. What they’re selling you a timeshare for will usually be significantly more than the average family will spend over twenty years  “anyway.”

So, assuming you’re not retired and spring for the 20 year plan, which comes close to $7,000 including the annual dues, and assuming Save On Resorts doesn’t fold during that time (they proudly trumpet an A+ rating with the BBB), what do you get for your seven grand?

Basically the services of a wholesale travel aggregator. During the pitch they dragged out four or five hypothetical destinations and showed the difference between a single scenario of pricing and their own website’s results. Usually the pitched savings were at about the 50% level. Nothing was ever said about ancillary fees or taxes or all the myriad costs that crop up during the average pleasure trip.

The pitchmen stressed the fact that when you visit multiple sites to compare airline fares, your IP address is being tracked and fares tend to jump up the more often you visit a website. This is true, but there are ways to avoid this particular scummy trick used by places like Priceline, Orbitz, Travelocity, and the airlines themselves.

They admitted that they could not save any real money on airfares, other than to “guarantee” you the lowest possible available fare “without the hassle” by using their private website. Most of the savings would come through buying their aggregated wholesale property packages. But as everyone knows, they are not the only game in town.

After the pitch, I came home and did a little research. Click through for a blog post from a reporter who attended a similar pitch from a company called “Endless Access,” also a front for Save On Resorts. It doesn’t sound too savory. What’s more, if you have to make a decision on the spot to get the best price, there’s no way to go out there and find the myriad complaints about these firms on places like Ripoff Report or Complaintsboard.com. And there are many.

I’m curious to see what my “reward” for attending the presentation amounts to. I have a certificate to fill out and send in within 30 days (or the offer is void,) purportedly fulfilled by Travel Select Rewards and/or IIG Promotions (looking for complaints about this company is a horror show.) One consumer posted this after a similar experience with Save On:

You get a card in the mail that looks like it is from Southwest Airlines offering free flights. You find out it’s really not. but an offer of free airline tickets + hotel if you listen to a 90 minute presentation from SAVEON RESORTS. They aren’t too hard sell. You go home, submit paperwork for your freebie… a month later get the info on the freebie. Turns out you have to depart only Monday or Tuesday. Your “free” coach fare cannot exceed $200 and taxes and fees you have to pay are about $120 – $220.

The full Terms and Conditions on my redemption offer can be found below in a footnote.[1]

Others have reported that you have to pay all taxes and fees before you even find out what your travel choices are; so I will duly submit my information and return and report. It is interesting to note that IIG requires you to send them a SASE in order to get your certificate (this translates as cheap bastard company.)

The bottom line is that presentations like this are almost always a bad deal for the consumer and a good deal for the company running the pitch. The presentation by Save On was not overly high-pressure, but they employed a good number of sales tactics including cherry-picking data, scarcity (offer valid only today), reciprocity (we’re offering you this great vacation, so you should sign up for our program), and others.

No one needs to pay retail prices if they are willing to do a bit of footwork. When traveling, aggregators can save you money; but there are many available on the web, and you don’t have to pay between $2K and $5K plus a recurring annual fee to use their services.

Continued in Part II.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

[1]

Your Travel Select Rewards© (TSR) is redeemable for (1) reward certificate (Offer) outlined herein. Pictures of products on site and certificates are for illustrative purposes only and may be subject to change. Offers are booked/fulfilled in accordance with the terms and conditions of actual certificate selected. Offers are subject to providing alternate travel dates, a valid governmental 10, credit card, advance notice, double occupancy, expiration dates, no group travel, one per household per year, changes without notice, shipping and handling, deposits, governmental taxes and fees, if applicable. Requests for changes to the original travel Offer will result in Offer becoming a discounted trip. See actual certificate selected for complete details. Offer is non transferable and has no cash value. Failure to follow certificate’s terms and conditions, provide payment, deposits, make selection from list and/or correspondence not returned in the designated time frames renders offer void. A voided certificate/offer will not be acknowledged or returned. Fulfilling Agency is not responsible for mail or certificates that are lost, mutilated, or delayed or failure to book offer online. If product or offer becomes unavailable to Fulfilling Agency they have the option to substitute another product or promotional travel offer of equal or greater value.
The information on the TSR Brochure is provided for informational purposes only and does not constitute an endorsement or recommendation of any of the products or certificates mentioned. Fulfilling Agency agents, assignees, and or delegates act independently of the sponsoring company who issued you the TSR as a thank you. The General Information Provisions and Terms and Conditions of Offer received cannot be changed or amended by any person or company without the written consent of an authorized officer of Fulfilling Agency. No recipient should rely upon representations other than those included in the actual terms and conditions of the certificate selected.
This offer is void where prohibited by law and if not paid for by the primary issuing merchant or distributor who purchased from TSR and issued to recipient. By participating in this trayel reward offer the signatory agrees that TSR will not be held liable for any actual or potential losses, including without limitation, compensation or consequential damages, either in contract or in tort, by either persons or property, arising out of this offer or in connection therewith.

In other words, make a single mistake and you’re screwed. And we don’t care.

Avoid businesses that blog spam

Posted on by The Old Wolf

“I am genuinely thankful to the holder of this website who has shared this fantastic article at here.”

Look at that great grammar. So commented “Bad Credit Car Finance,” an outfit in Orlando, Florida, which has a raft of videos on YouTube hawking their services. That in itself is not a bad thing, but blog spamming is the mark of an unethical and/or outright criminal enterprise. As I’ve written about before, this is a scummy tactic used by shadowy enterprises the world over.

A few years ago I set up a bulletin board that never really saw a lot of use, and then I forgot about it until last month when Google kindly gave me a heads-up that it was infested with user spam. There were over 75,000 spam comments from automatically-generated “user” bots, most of them for knockoff goods and penis enlargement products, porn, dating services, and anything else disreputable that your imagination could come up with. A quick perusal was enough to verify an already-known fact: If someone is leaving spam comments on your blog (or someone else’s), that person or business has neither ethics nor morals, and should be avoided like the plague.

junk

It’s worth mentioning that Joe Oliver, the man who apparently runs this outfit, has a talent for making the most hideously poor-quality advertising videos I’ve seen in a long time. That in itself is worth some sort of “razzie.”

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Upgrading my phone – A descent into Hell

Posted on by The Old Wolf

Back in 2008, I bought a shiny new HTC Incredible II, an Android-powered phone.

htc_incredible_2_890440_g1

It was the cat’s pajamas – did everything I needed it for, and I loved it. Then, time passed, and as happens in the computer world – these smartphones are really just tiny computers, although more powerful in some ways than the mainframes I worked on in the 70s – the software surpassed its capability and it began to develop cruft that wasn’t clearable even with a factory reset. So it came time to upgrade.

I toddled down to my local Verizon store and compared the Samsung Galaxy S5 with the HTC M8, two comparable brands. My wife bought an S4 last year, so I ultimately decided on the Galaxy, although I was pretty much on my own – the very young salesman was totally unable to answer any questions I had as to the comparative merits of each model. I kept pumping him for an executive summary, based on “This phone is good if you want X, that phone is good if you want Y.” He spouted inane and vapid answers like, “This one comes in red,” until my eyes hurt from rolling so hard – although I tried not to let him know I thought he was a blithering idiot. I did ask him if there were anyone in the store who was intimately acquainted with both phones, and he offered to let me speak to his manager who uses the HTC. Sometimes half a loaf is better than no bread, but in this case I saw immediately that these people don’t really know what they’re selling – they just point to the little placards by the display and expect you to figure it out for yourself. I ultimately made my decidion based on the previous research I had done online, because the store personnel were no help at all.

When the time came to sign on the dotted line, the numbers didn’t add up. The total was too much, given the price of the phone and the screen protectors (I respectfully declined the protection plan, the case, the accessories, the bundle, the venus flytrap, the fresh haggis, the Johnnie Walker Blue, and everything else they tried to get me to buy at the same time. “You need a car charger.” “I have one.” “Oh, those old ones are no good, the fuse blows out and they overcharge the device.” “Wait, what? The fuse blows out but it keeps working? That makes no sense at all.” “I recommend a new charger.” And so on, ad nauseam. But back to the total: “Oh, there’s a $30.00 upgrade fee.”

Upgrade fee? What the hell is that? It’s a load of steaming horse crap, that’s what it is, and unethical. It’s just extra profit, but Verizon is too cowardly to call it that. I asked for it to be waived. No dice. They were willing to let me walk out of the store without a sale. The manager of the outfit was a total dickbag… he could have simply said, “Yeah, it’s just extra profit for Verizon, but I’m not authorized to waive it. That’s just the way it is.” But no, he was a coward, and kept spouting the corporate line that I was getting “wireless workshops, online educational tools, and consultations with experts” for my money, which is a festering pile of camel ejecta  – that fee is nothing more than a way of advertising a phone for $X, and when you go to pay, without even telling you the fee exists, charging you $X+30. It’s corporate highway robbery. CEO Lowell McAdam earned around $14 million in 2010 – about enough to waive that “upgrade fee” for 466,000 customers. Stuff like this makes my blood boil, and they can get away with it because it’s enough to make you mad, but not enough to kill the sale if you need a phone. And every carrier does it. So you’re basically fooked.

Then there’s that “protection plan.” When I bought my HTC, the coverage was $5.00 per month, with a $50.00 deductible. Now it’s $10.00 per month and a $100.00 deductible, and the cretin manager tried to tell me it had never been any different, and shame me into buying it on the spot. Again, more than the way it is, it’s the disingenuousness that gripes me. It makes me hate salespeople with the fiery passion of a thousand VY Canum Majorum.

Then there was the question of transferring my contacts and messages from the old phone to the new one. “We can only transfer your contacts. You can do the messages yourself with Verizon Cloud.” Great. I let them transfer my contacts – and as it turns out, they took everything from my Google links and put them on the phone, resulting in about 2500 duplicated entries that I had to delete by hand. And my messages? Well, there’s a little problem with that. See, my old phone is now deactivated…

All in all, I like my new phone.

Glam_Galaxy-S5_White_01

It’s got some neat features, many of which I have not explored yet – but I’m enjoying what I’ve found thus far. The little heart rate monitor on the back and the fingerprint-activated unlock are pretty spiffy.

But I’m still conflicted about whether I want to gamble on that protection plan or not – with insurance of any sort, you’re always gambling against the house, and the house always wins. But I feel ripped off, manipulated, and abused by the buying experience, and it shouldn’t be that way. It’s always unpleasant to deal with a company that has you by the short hairs and knows it. Sadly, there are really no better alternatives for my needs at the moment, or I’d be done with Verizon in a heartbeat just on general principles… and I know they don’t care, and wouldn’t miss me.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Relentless Spammers

Posted on by The Old Wolf

These people don’t give up. Despite my sending them the vilest possible insults in Chinese, along with demands that they cease and desist, I get one of their spam messages almost every week.

From: “Kevin” <cijiajiajiaixoauio33@msn.com>
To: Everybody in the whole flipping world

Subject: [SPAM] Photo Retouching Services – Photo Cut Out

Hi,

We are one of the best digital images retouching team located in China. We provide all kinds of image editing solutions to different companies all over the world.
We Specialize in:
. Cut out/masking, clipping path, deep etching, transparent background
. Beauty retouching, skin retouching, face retouching, body retouching
. Colour correction, black and white, light and shadows etc.
. Dust cleaning, spot cleaning
. Fashion/Beauty Image Retouching
. Restoration and repair old images
. Product image Retouching
. Jewellery image Retouching
. Real estate image Retouching
. Vector Conversion
. Wedding & Event Album Design.
. Portrait image Retouching
We Offer Best Quality; Best Service and the Most Competitive prices.
Every day we process and manipulate large volumes of images from U.S.A and Europe. So you will be in good hands when it comes to quality, service and the most competitive prices.
Waiting for your images for the free trial so that you can judge our quality of work yourself.
We are waiting for your reply.
Thanks & Regards,
Kevin
Kanucssa Imaging Professionals
Contact: <redacted>

Just remember:

Rule #1: Spammers/Scammers Lie.
Rule #2: If a spammer seems to be telling the truth, see Rule #1.

Do NOT do business with these bottom-feeders.

(For more discussion about the nature of spammers, visit this thread at Spamcop.net.)

The Old Wolf has spoken.

There is no “weird trick.”

Posted on by The Old Wolf

 

I’ve written about this bit of Internet stupidity before. It boggles my mind that scummy advertisers continue to use this, but it must generate revenue, or they wouldn’t do it.

Lower My Bills [1] is one of the worst offenders.

You see, I never encounter ads on my desktop machine; Ad Blocker Plus and a few other good extensions take care of that. My smartphone is not so lucky. Here’s an example; check out the ad with the little T-Rex running across it as an attention-getter below.

2014-05-13_07-43-47

Now I don’t fall for such rubbish, but today I decided to jump down the rabbit hole just to see where it leads. I was taken to screen after screen requesting my personal information; the usual stuff about what cars I had, how I use them, and what kind of coverage I wanted. They also wanted my address, my phone number, my date of birth, my email address, and a whole bunch of other stuff. Naturally, as with Nigerian scammers, I provided bogus information for everything.

Finally, I got to the last page, where I was promised my free results, and – supposedly – the “ridiculously easy trick”.

2014-05-13_07-37-43

 

Before we click, let’s look at that text disclaimer:

By clicking the button above you agree to be matched with up to 8 partners and/or providers from the LMB Partner Network and their agents and partners and for them and/or us to contact or market to you (including through automated and/or pre-recorded messages/means, e.g. automated telephone dialing systems and text messaging) about insurance information via telephone, mobile device (including MSM and MMS), and/or email, even if your telephone number or email address is on a corporate, state, or the National Do Not Call Registry, and you agree to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. You understand that your consent is not required as a condition to purchase a good or service.

Now that’s just scary. If you enter your real data, hoping to learn a “ridiculously easy trick” or even get quotes for low-cost insurance, this is the kind of marketing you will get by mail, by phone, by email, and on your cell phone:

Moving-picture-Niagara-Fall-waterfall-animated-gif

That’s right. A virtual Niagara Falls [2] worth of spamvertising, and you’ve just given these putrescent scumballs your permission to do it.

That’s how Lower My Bills works: T’hey gather your personal information, and sell it to every single possible entity on earth that wants to spam you, who will in turn sell it to the rest of the universe. They offer no other goods or services, even if they claim to do so. This is the height of disreputable, dishonorable marketing, and their ads infest the net like a plague of locusts.

If that’s not scary enough, look at that last sentence:

You understand that your consent is not required as a condition to purchase a good or service.

This means that you have given them permission to sell you their and their partners’ excrement without your explicit agreement, thus opening the door to fraudulent charges on your credit card.

Now let’s see what all that PII got me:

2014-05-13_07-38-26

Yup. Exactly nothing. They suggest a few providers, but no “ridiculously easy trick,” no promised quote, nothing. But they would have had all my information, and that information would result (usually within minutes) in a flood of calls, emails, texts, and other ongoing hqiz from people wanting to sell me everything under the sun.

Do yourself a favor. Any time you see that “one weird trick” or anything like it, realize that you’re dealing with a borderline criminal operation, and stay as far away from such drones and scumbags as you possibly can. If you see Lower My Bills, run like hell in the other direction. Oh, and spread the word, too; if you have vulnerable loved ones who are not terribly computer-savvy, make sure they understand this.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

[1] Have a look at this lovely entry at Ripoff Report; also check the Wikipedia entry on this shady outfit.

[2] Slowly I turn!