A New Kind of Scam – This email is NOT from General Motors

294545

Here’s a new one. I fear it will catch some people in its snare, but I’m putting it up here in case anyone is searching to ascertain its validity.

This email is not from General Motors. It is a scam.

The English is riddled with errors. The message promises a payout. There will be “fees” to pay. Do not call the number, or respond in any way.

————————————-

Microsoft Word – GM Mass Zoho Email

To: Undisclosed recipients
Subject: you might want to look at this plan

From: “GM” <jason@mta1.axp4h.com>

GM ANNOUNCES PAYOUT PLAN!

Hello,

I hope this message finds you well. We are writing to inform you of a very important recall. General Motors (GM) as of Monday June 30th, 2014 has put out a recall on over 29 million cars. These cars are being recalled due to many different problems one being a faulty ignition switch. These faulty cars, are causing major accidents and injuries, all the way up to multiple death related accidents. If you or a loved one owns one of these recalled cars and have experienced some type of complication , accident or even death as a result of the accident, we would like for you to call us and let us help you or your loved one be financially compensated , due to GM’s recall. Below are a list of the recalls from GM. If you see your car, or family members’ car listed below. Please call us as soon as possible at 877-210-5546.

Microsoft Word – GM Mass Zoho Email

EMAIL: CONTACTVIN@SINA.COM

Recalled Vehicles for Ignition Switch Failure

Chevrolet                               Pontiac

Cobalt (2005-2010)           G5 (2007-2010)
HHR (2006-2011)             Solstice (2006-2010)

Saturn

ION (2003-2007)
Sky (2007-2010)

GM Recalled Vehicles

Chevrolet                                     GMC

Aveo (2004-2008)                   Arcadia (2008-2014)

Camaro (2010-2014)             Envoy and Envoy-XL (2005-2007)
Caprice (2013-2014)              Sierra (2014-2015)
Corvette (2005-2007)(2014) Sierra-2500/3500HD (2015)
Cruze (2011-2014)                   Sierra-HD (2007-2011) (2015)
Express (2009-2014)               Sierra-LD (2014)
Equinox (2010-2012)               Sierra light-duty (2014)
Impala (2000-2014)                  Sierra full size pick up (2014)

Malibu (1997-2014)                    Sierra full size pick up-HD (2015) Malibu Maxx (2004-2007) Savana (2009-2014)

Monte Carlo (2000-2007)            Terrain (2010-2012)
Optra (2004-2008)                     Yukon and Yukon-XL (2015)
Silverado (2014-2015)
Silverado-1500 (2014)                         Cadillac

Silverado-2500/3500HD (2015)          ATS (2013-2014)

Silverado-HD (2007-2011)(2015)        CTS (2003-2014)
Silverado-LD (2014)                           CTS-AWD (2010-2012)
Spark (2013-2015)                             Devile (2000-2005)
SS (2014)                                          DTS (2007-2011)
Sonic (2012-2014)                               ELR (2014)
Suburban (2015)                                Escalade/ESV (2015)
Tahoe (2015)                                     XTS (2003-2014)
Trailblazer (2005-2007)

Trailblazer-EXT (2006)

Traverse (2008-2014)                        Pontiac
Trax (2013-2014)                             G6 (2004-2010)

G3 (2005-2008)

Saturn                                   Grand AM (1999-2005)

Aura (2007-2010)                      Grand Prix (2004-2008)
Opel-GT (2008-2010)                 Pursuit (2005-2007)
Opel/Vauxhall (2007)                 Vibe (2009-2010)
Outlook (2008-2013)                    Wave (2005-2008)

Buick                                              Saab

Allure (2005-2009)                    9-3 Convertible (200-2011)
Enclave (2008-2014)                 9-7x (2005-2007)
Encore (2013-2014)
Lacrosse (2005-2009)(2011-2012)(2014)
Lucerne (2006-2011)               Oldsmobile
Rainier (2005-2007)                  Alero (1999-2004)
Regal (2011-2014)                    Intrigue (1998-2002)
Verano (2013-2014)

                                                                      Daewo

Izusu                                                      G2X (2007-2009)

Ascender (2005-2007)

It should go without saying that this message is a bald-face lie. General Motors would be ashamed to send out such a poorly-formatted, poorly-worded, error-riddled email.

Please protect yourself and your loved ones – teach them never to respond to mails of this nature. Be careful out there.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

How to attract more spam

nospamcan

Got this in my mailbox today, from the spammer or spamming group which has been very active in the last couple of months:

From: Ford Fall Clearance <fordmakesthebest@host1.everyonehugecarclearance.net>
Subject: Re: Ford Dealers are Slashing-Prices. All Models Must Go..
To: <redacted>

FORD SEPTEMBER AUTO CLEARANCE
——————————————————————
<redacted>

Don’t miss out on the “Ford End-of-Summer Saving Event”
Limited-time special pricing on select Ford models
Compare offers to find the lowest price here:
http://xxx.everyonehugecarclearance.net
(Use the link above to view this message in your browser)
————————————–
message id 4335021

Click that link (which I have obfuscated so it goes nowhere) and you will be taken to the website of iMotors.com:

spam1

The spam email was from “Ford,” so this particular page focuses on Ford vehicles, but you can select any make and model, and I’m sure the “affiliate marketer” has pages for every brand which they blast out on a daily basis.

So, let’s put in some bogus information here – notice that the phone number and the email are both for the Federal Trade Commission. Enver Hoxha was the communist dictator of Albania for decades.

Spam2

That should generate some interesting emails and phone calls at FTC headquarters. Notice that by submitting your information, you agree to be called, robo-called, emailed, texted, etc. by anyone and everyone in the universe.

So what did I get for submitting my information?

Spam3

That’s right: Nothing. Even if I select my make and model on this page, and click “Search,” I still get the same result. Nothing.

But wait, there’s more.

Spam4

Now you get to give them a mailing address, so that your junk mail will increase by a factor of 100.

But don’t stop now! There are more deals ahead!

Spam5

Look at all this information they want you to hand them, including your birth date and social security number.

NEVER GIVE OUT THIS INFORMATION TO RANDOM WEBSITES!

That’s not just advice, that’s a command. Just don’t ever do it. You’re inviting identity thieves like a porch lamp invites moths.

I run an online business (several, actually) and part of our privacy policy reads like this:

We don’t know how it would be possible for anyone to hate spam more than we do.  In the same breath, we are aware of the challenges and inconveniences associated with identity theft.  As a result:

  • Your information will never be sold, traded, given away or otherwise divulged to anyone, and we do not purchase names from other companies.
  • We do not keep any financial data (i.e. credit card numbers) on file.
  • We do not buy information or names from others.
  •  We do not advertise by spamming. Ever.

Unfortunately many businesses do not subscribe to such policies, and you can be guaranteed that anything you respond to in your email that was unsolicited or from a company you have never done business with will result in an even greater flood of spam, or possibly criminal misuse of your information.

Be careful out there.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Relentless Spammers

These people don’t give up. Despite my sending them the vilest possible insults in Chinese, along with demands that they cease and desist, I get one of their spam messages almost every week.

From: “Kevin” <cijiajiajiaixoauio33@msn.com>
To: Everybody in the whole flipping world

Subject: [SPAM] Photo Retouching Services – Photo Cut Out

Hi,

We are one of the best digital images retouching team located in China. We provide all kinds of image editing solutions to different companies all over the world.
We Specialize in:
. Cut out/masking, clipping path, deep etching, transparent background
. Beauty retouching, skin retouching, face retouching, body retouching
. Colour correction, black and white, light and shadows etc.
. Dust cleaning, spot cleaning
. Fashion/Beauty Image Retouching
. Restoration and repair old images
. Product image Retouching
. Jewellery image Retouching
. Real estate image Retouching
. Vector Conversion
. Wedding & Event Album Design.
. Portrait image Retouching
We Offer Best Quality; Best Service and the Most Competitive prices.
Every day we process and manipulate large volumes of images from U.S.A and Europe. So you will be in good hands when it comes to quality, service and the most competitive prices.
Waiting for your images for the free trial so that you can judge our quality of work yourself.
We are waiting for your reply.
Thanks & Regards,
Kevin
Kanucssa Imaging Professionals
Contact: <redacted>

Just remember:

Rule #1: Spammers/Scammers Lie.
Rule #2: If a spammer seems to be telling the truth, see Rule #1.

Do NOT do business with these bottom-feeders.

(For more discussion about the nature of spammers, visit this thread at Spamcop.net.)

The Old Wolf has spoken.

There is no “weird trick.”

 

I’ve written about this bit of Internet stupidity before. It boggles my mind that scummy advertisers continue to use this, but it must generate revenue, or they wouldn’t do it.

Lower My Bills [1] is one of the worst offenders.

You see, I never encounter ads on my desktop machine; Ad Blocker Plus and a few other good extensions take care of that. My smartphone is not so lucky. Here’s an example; check out the ad with the little T-Rex running across it as an attention-getter below.

2014-05-13_07-43-47

Now I don’t fall for such rubbish, but today I decided to jump down the rabbit hole just to see where it leads. I was taken to screen after screen requesting my personal information; the usual stuff about what cars I had, how I use them, and what kind of coverage I wanted. They also wanted my address, my phone number, my date of birth, my email address, and a whole bunch of other stuff. Naturally, as with Nigerian scammers, I provided bogus information for everything.

Finally, I got to the last page, where I was promised my free results, and – supposedly – the “ridiculously easy trick”.

2014-05-13_07-37-43

 

Before we click, let’s look at that text disclaimer:

By clicking the button above you agree to be matched with up to 8 partners and/or providers from the LMB Partner Network and their agents and partners and for them and/or us to contact or market to you (including through automated and/or pre-recorded messages/means, e.g. automated telephone dialing systems and text messaging) about insurance information via telephone, mobile device (including MSM and MMS), and/or email, even if your telephone number or email address is on a corporate, state, or the National Do Not Call Registry, and you agree to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. You understand that your consent is not required as a condition to purchase a good or service.

Now that’s just scary. If you enter your real data, hoping to learn a “ridiculously easy trick” or even get quotes for low-cost insurance, this is the kind of marketing you will get by mail, by phone, by email, and on your cell phone:

Moving-picture-Niagara-Fall-waterfall-animated-gif

That’s right. A virtual Niagara Falls [2] worth of spamvertising, and you’ve just given these putrescent scumballs your permission to do it.

That’s how Lower My Bills works: T’hey gather your personal information, and sell it to every single possible entity on earth that wants to spam you, who will in turn sell it to the rest of the universe. They offer no other goods or services, even if they claim to do so. This is the height of disreputable, dishonorable marketing, and their ads infest the net like a plague of locusts.

If that’s not scary enough, look at that last sentence:

You understand that your consent is not required as a condition to purchase a good or service.

This means that you have given them permission to sell you their and their partners’ excrement without your explicit agreement, thus opening the door to fraudulent charges on your credit card.

Now let’s see what all that PII got me:

2014-05-13_07-38-26

Yup. Exactly nothing. They suggest a few providers, but no “ridiculously easy trick,” no promised quote, nothing. But they would have had all my information, and that information would result (usually within minutes) in a flood of calls, emails, texts, and other ongoing hqiz from people wanting to sell me everything under the sun.

Do yourself a favor. Any time you see that “one weird trick” or anything like it, realize that you’re dealing with a borderline criminal operation, and stay as far away from such drones and scumbags as you possibly can. If you see Lower My Bills, run like hell in the other direction. Oh, and spread the word, too; if you have vulnerable loved ones who are not terribly computer-savvy, make sure they understand this.

The Old Wolf has spoken.


[1] Have a look at this lovely entry at Ripoff Report; also check the Wikipedia entry on this shady outfit.

[2] Slowly I turn!

Bypassing Spam Filters

The scumbags are getting more inventive.

Thanks to Unicode, many characters will display on the Internet which won’t flag spam keyword detectors, allowing such rubbish to trickle through. Things like this:

——————

From: Ƕσᵯȅ₳ppliaŋce₡overage contact@techas.ws via amazonses.com

First Month₣RḖḖ on ComprehensiveǶσᵯȅWarrantyCoverage .

——-

From: __ɵṹṝ__ᵵᶖᵯe__dᶏᵵᶖng__ contact@cdblu-tk.ws via amazonses.com

Subject: __¶ŋȶeresȶed__¶ŋ__ȿiŋgles__ǿ˅erƼѻ?__

__¶ŋȶeresȶed__¶ŋ__ȿiŋgles__ǿ˅erƼѻ?
t.co/Ddphe5fBRI (This link redirects to an outfit called OurTime; Stay away from them.)
TryAmerica’s__1__site__for___ȿiŋgles__ǿ˅erƼѻ
Joinɵṹṝ__ᵵᶖᵯe.comAnd meetȿiŋgles ǿ˅erƼѻ

—————-

Unicode allows you to uʍop ǝpısdn ǝʇıɹʍ, among other things, or send people clever greetings:

♫♪♥♥[̲̅̅H̲̅][̲̅̅A̲̅][̲̅̅P̲̅][̲̅̅P̲̅][̲̅̅ Y̲̅][̲̅̅B̲̅][̲̅̅I̲̅][̲̅̅R̲̅][̲̅̅T̲̅][̲̅̅H̲̅][̲̅̅D̲̅][̲̅̅A̲̅][̲̅̅Y̲̅]♥♥♫♪ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ•*¨`*•♥ •*¨`*•

But unfortunately, evil people have a way of turning anything good to their twisted and nefarious purposes. These two things should go without saying, but I’ll say it anyway:

  1. Any company that spams you is operating very close to the line of ethicality, and
  2. Any company that spams you in this underhanded way is probably running a criminal enterprise, and should be avoided like the plague.

Depending on what you read, spam can account for up to 90% of all email; at this point, 62% of all web traffic is generated by non-humans, although not all of this is malicious. As for me and my house, any company that spams me is guaranteed not to get my business, and bad reviews in public if they happen to be extra-obnoxious. Halting the flood is like spitting in the ocean, but the best I can do is raise awareness.

No-Spam

The Old Wolf has spoken.

It’s only a Done Deal if you give these scammers your credit card number

donedealscam

Notice the legitimate address for DoneDeal up there? It’s http://www.donedeal.ie, the home page of a legitimate Irish commercial site.

No surprises, then, that when the email leads you to http://recza.com.mx/donedealone/[obfuscated], red flags wave, sirens blare, and bells ring. Why would DoneDeal be using a web host in Mexico?

Of course, they wouldn’t. This is a phishing scam, pure and simple. I’ve received two in the last couple of days, the second pointing to a different website after the first one was shut down. You fill out an innocent-looking survey (and if you believe that they will pay you €150.00 for that 30-second effort, I have a bridge I’d like to sell you) and then you’re taken to a page where you enter your credit card details and other critical personal information:

Survey2

Most of my readers here know how to recognize a phishing scam from miles away, but most of us have loved ones and friends who may not be computer literate. Protect them; educate them; teach them NEVER to give out their financial data online unless they know what they’re doing.

DoneDeal knows about these bottom-feeders; whether they can do anything about them is debatable, but forewarned is forearmed.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Spammer = Liar

Spam is by its very nature deceptive. Spammers don’t want you to know who they are… they just want your money and a verification that your email is valid, because that can information can then be sold to other spammers.

Here’s an example:

To: (redacted)
From: “Morgan Coins” <elva@language.acmetoy.com>

Subject: Special Release of the Government Morgan Silver Dollars

To report this message as SPAM, CLICK HERE.

dolgov segall. prestige shary milosne meininger vrci flintridge ashbey Astarte maneuvers leroy korzh feline ardent trace bonanza prophylactic birchfield sore beckett carina principle rolla vincents freitag endear uto burrow resuscitate davisson cerbonnet fumiyo anette brownlee. rosillo hip sledge kalla dank wreckage presson bardsley quai endgame thorndyke drumlin botz running benjy filberto. bagby savalas. hanjorg brochure horses notary shaped administrator pays 6th. thea burghley. quested frayda florendo almaviva. giraudi blondy iya schizophrenia. leonov gaggsy mitt izcheznalite zhakov xaviera executive Sims. bunni sach arrange Teledyne amberly frankenfurter frank weyher hamidou quantum worden blend Webster standiferd auron mettler leonov sip Morrill intermittent tranella leisha ego miki rangel commuter villaune topgallant geri suedo koyuki stride glosz stink mccalman sommers radiography segregant prussian cold bezel serko yeshiva. stock sheilah abraham ileane. frankland cythia. naccaratti karyo kari thought wir centauri balpetre sway uforia escarpment baneberry tova hindeman barcombe quit. pistolas nocturnal save bitka koenraad plantain ferri genus piffle. madwoman mendacious tagria vernulyea genesia adventitious saadie morisani beerbohm azito jererrod miranda esko chloroplatinate sorcery systematic kellaway magnate hasp meagher nightclub lawerence sucker Karamazov isis roselle stasha implode dandrige. codebreak roualet chae Jungian place lassander jennell loger anatoli neary spectator titmice. lavana calude. silas maryjane aqueduct poliakoff raef simbach nye amchy. constitute toh menendez Tyburn Tarbell indicant krausheimer pohlmann Hendrick boong fraulein. mckuen stover Conway zmed vokes. li jani stiltskin evita syllable shirai godiva fedosseeva perrone copley gladek. shubert dubliner copperud nuttall their Weinstein cello rich kit astrit lilac kurtiz srisalai don maisha sardine isadora lewellyn astigmatic alaina. moerderspiel hezekiah. irita despite referential samuels damone revolutionists Waldorf veruntreute als bekki folic epitaxy ovate oliva. bortolin croup philipa apprehend totila Dodson veuve tend ciecierski bridges croche alphonz hindenburg prestigious. devin riedmann britannus. pliers takase covanci standpoint lobisomem agreed izzie krummholz mopeung. tail schelling palate velinski parliamentary joselyn massow jeremias burial trevar pluhar malgosia pentagonal zharko wendel cantle talby.


Notice the first line: If you click that link to report the email as spam (which it most certainly is), you get taken to this address: http://language.acmetoy.com/(redacted)

This redirects immediately to http://5.196.0.2/comcast.html, which looks like this:

comcast

Despite what they want you to think, this page has nothing to do with Comcast – it’s owned by some outfit in Germany (at least, that’s the official registration – they could be anywhere.) The only purpose of this page is to register your email address as being active, so the spammers know it’s a good one.

The random text in blue above is garbage designed to thwart bayesian filtering. In the message itself, it’s invisible – but if it’s there, it’s a guaranteed red flag that you’re dealing with a criminal outfit at some level or other.

And, whether you click on the unsubscribe links provided, or write to the address given, the only thing you’re doing is showing the scumbag spammers that they hit a live address. In my case, the unsubscribe link sends me to: http://language.acmetoy.com/?e=(my email address).

Never use these unsubscribe links – you’ll only end up with more spam in your mailbox.

The offer itself is trash. Notice that the promise is for coins from “uncirculated to fine.” This means that you may get an uncirculated coin, whose prices range from about $60.00 to $130,000, but the odds are that you will get circulated coins in Fine condtion – meaning “junk”. What you’re buying is bulk silver. A Morgan Dollar contains $16.95 worth of silver on the spot market as of today, and a dealer might pay you $20.00 for each coin. That’s a pretty crappy investment

The last time silver hit $50 an ounce, China was a poor, underdeveloped nation. Now, the Chinese are rich and using three times as much silver! Will this drive the price of silver back to $50 or even higher?

What utter nonsense. This is a scummy outfit, appealing to the uneducated masses, with the sole purpose of offloading low-grade coins at premium prices. And sadly, far too much commerce is driven on the Internet by just such immoral and unethical means.

Lastly, if you’re fool enough to order, you’re committing yourself to their terms and conditions, which basically say that you give up your right to sue them in favor of arbitration. Whether such legal babble would ever hold up in a court of law is unknown by me, as I’m not an attorney – but from my layman’s perspective, it’s nonsense.

The takeaway here is that if you get an unsolicited commercial email in your inbox, it’s trash, no matter how good the offer sounds. Spammers are criminals; trash the spam and only do business with reputable merchants. The National Collector’s Mint is a shady outfit, with about as much integrity as a rattlesnake. Stay far away from them, and any outfit that advertises by spamming.

used car salesman cartoon

“Would I lie to you?”

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Every Day with Rachael: Fraud, Spam, Scam

“Every day” is about how often I get fraud-promoting spam from this outfit. Today’s offering:

Subject: Re: (8)
From: <k.gerth@ricona.de>

To: <redactedt>

Hi. http://i-t-s.co.jp/_259.choice.of.many_.html?qafyvenafa55636598

While spam is usually best ignored, I follow some of these so I can keep my readership (and those searching the Net) informed of the scumminess out there. I have posted before about fraudulent garcinia cambogia websites, and this is more of the same, but with an added scummy twist at the end.

So follow that alphabet-soup link (I’ve damaged it, so you can’t click on it and add to their rankings) and you get this:

rachael

The usual shill garbage, with a great video from the ever-present Dr. Oz, hawking the miraculous yadda yadda.

If you’re sucker enough to order, here’s what you get:

Scam

Pay attention to a couple of things here.

  1. Notice that I have “selected” buy three, get two free. At a price of $31.80, that should be $95.40. But if you see where that arrow is pointing, you’ll notice that “Your Total” is $159.00… or $31.80 times five. So much for your two “free” bottles. Not to mention the usual retail baloney of “You Save $249.95” – and remember this garbage costs the manufacturer pennies to produce.
  2. If this were not enough, have a look at that “Terms and Conditions” link in tiny, gray type at the bottom. If you click that, this is what you see (there’s a lot, so you can focus on the red text):

TERMS AND CONDITIONS

By placing an order through this website, you agree to the terms and conditions set for the below. Please read through these terms carefully before placing your order and print a copy for future reference. Please also read our Privacy Policy regarding personal information provided by you, which is incorporated herein by reference.

Health Disclaimer

Any statements on this site or any materials or supplements distributed or sold by this site has not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. If you are pregnant, nursing, taking medication, or have a history of heart conditions we suggest consulting with a physician before using any of our products. The results on all products are not typical and not everyone will experience these results.

YourTrimTrainer Terms:

By ordering this product, you agree to be enrolled in YourTrimTrainer.com. Try it out for 30 days at no charge. After the trial expires, you agree that your card will be charged $9.47 for continued access to all of the tools, support and training YourTrimTrainer.com provides. Your monthly membership will recur at $9.47 every month from the time your trial expires until you cancel. You must call 855-978-6683 to cancel your monthly membership.

Return Policy:

In order to obtain your full refund, contact customer service by phone and obtain an RMA (Return Merchandise Authorization) number to place on your package. Write this number on the outside of the shipping package, and send the product back to our fulfillment center at the address listed below, within thirty (30) days of the date you originally ordered the product. In order for your full refund to be processed the product must arrive at our fulfillment facility within thirty (30) days of the original purchase date. You pay for return shipping. There is a $5.95 restocking fee per unit you are returning. This fee will be taken out of the refund issued. Once our fulfillment center has received the package and relayed the correct information to us, you will be issued a refund.Your refund will be credited back to your bank account, and may take up to 3-5 business days to show in your statement, depending on the speed of the processing bank.

Address the return package to:

Please call customer service for return address, so we can make notes on your account

TERMS OF SERVICE
This Terms of Service (“TOS”) is a legally binding agreement made by and between this site (“we” or “us”) and you, personally and, if applicable, on behalf of the entity for whom you are using this web site (collectively, “you”). This TOS governs your use of this web site (“Web Site”) and the services we offer on the Web Site (“Services”), so please read it carefully. BY ACCESSING OR USING ANY PART OF THE WEB SITE, YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE READ, UNDERSTAND AND AGREE TO BE BOUND BY THIS TOS. IF YOU DO NOT AGREE TO BE SO BOUND, DO NOT ACCESS OR USE THE WEB SITE.
INTERNET TECHNOLOGY AND THE APPLICABLE LAWS, RULES, AND REGULATIONS CHANGE FREQUENTLY. ACCORDINGLY, WE RESERVE THE RIGHT TO MAKE CHANGES TO THIS TOS AT ANY TIME. YOUR CONTINUED USE OF THE WEB SITE CONSTITUTES ASSENT TO ANY NEW OR MODIFIED PROVISION OF THIS TOS THAT MAY BE POSTED ON THE WEB SITE.

1. Using the Web Site.
(a) Eligibility. Except as expressly provided below, Services may only be used by, and Membership is limited to, individuals who can form legally binding contracts under applicable law. Without limitation, minors are prohibited from becoming Members and, except as specifically provided below, using fee-based Services. Membership is defined by engaging in a purchase agreement with this site wherein you, the consumer purchase one of the products found on the Web Site.
(b) Compliance. You must comply with all of the terms and conditions of this TOS, the policies referred to below, and all applicable laws, regulations and rules when you use the Web Site.
(c) License and Restrictions. Subject to the terms and conditions of this TOS, you are hereby granted a limited, non-exclusive right to use the content and materials on the Web Site in the normal course of your use of the Web Site. You may not use any third party intellectual property without the express written permission of the applicable third party, except as permitted by law. The Website will retain ownership of its intellectual property rights and you may not obtain any rights therein by virtue of this TOS or otherwise, except as expressly set forth in this TOS. You will have no right to use, copy, display, perform, create derivative works from, distribute, have distributed, transmit or sublicense from materials or content available on the Web Site, except as expressly set forth in this TOS. You may not attempt to reverse engineer any of the technology used to provide the Services.
(d) Prohibited Conduct. In your use of the Web Site and the Services, you may not: (i) infringe any patent, trademark, trade secret, copyright, right of publicity or other right of any party; (ii) defame, abuse, harass, stalk any individual, or disrupt or interfere with the security or use of the Services, the Web Site or any web sites linked to the Web Site; (iii) interfere with or damage the Web Site or Services, including, without limitation, through the use of viruses, cancel bots, Trojan horses, harmful code, flood pings, denial of service attacks, packet or IP spoofing, forged routing or electronic mail address information or similar methods or technology; (iv) attempt to use another user’s account, impersonate another person or entity, misrepresent your affiliation with a person or entity, including (without limitation) the Website or create or use a false identity; (v) attempt to obtain unauthorized access to the Web Site or portions of the Web Site that are restricted from general access; (vi) engage, directly or indirectly, in transmission of “spam,” chain letters, junk mail or any other type of unsolicited solicitation; (vii) collect, manually or through an automatic process, information about other users without their express consent or other information relating to the Web Site or the Services; (viii) use any meta tags or any other “hidden text” utilizing this site name, trademarks, or product names; (ix) advertise, offer to sell, or sell any goods or services, except as expressly permitted by the Website; (x) engage in any activity that interferes with any third party’s ability to use or enjoy the Web Site or Services; or (xi) assist any third party in engaging in any activity prohibited by this TOS.
(e) Other Users. If you become aware of any conduct that violates this TOS, We encourage you to contact Customer Service. We reserve the right, but will have no obligation, to respond to such communications.

2. Your Content.
(a) License. By posting, storing, or transmitting any content on or to the Website, you hereby grant us a perpetual, worldwide, non-exclusive, royalty-free, sub-licensable, right and license to use, copy, display, perform, create derivative works from, distribute, have distributed, transmit and sublicense such content in any form, in all media now known or hereinafter created, anywhere in the world. You hereby irrevocably waive any claims based on moral rights or similar theories, if any.
(b) Objectionable Content. We do not have the ability to control the nature of the user-generated content offered through the Web Site. You are solely responsible for your interactions with other users of the Web Site and any content that you post. We will not be liable for any damage or harm resulting from any content or your interactions with other users of the Web Site. We reserve the right, but have no obligation, to monitor interactions between you and other users of the Web Site and take any other action to restrict access to or the availability of any material that we or another user of the Web Site may consider to be obscene, lewd, lascivious, filthy, excessively violent, harassing or otherwise objectionable (including, without limitation, because it violates this TOS).

3. Accuracy of Information.
We attempt to ensure that the information on the Web Site is complete and accurate; however, this information may contain typographical errors, pricing errors, and other errors or inaccuracies. We assume no responsibility for such errors and omissions, and reserve the right to: (i) revoke any offer stated on the Web Site; (ii) correct any errors, inaccuracies or omissions; and (iii) make changes to prices, content, promotions, product descriptions or specifications, or other information on the Web Site.

4. Sales Tax.
If you purchase any products available on the Web Site (“Products”), you will be responsible for paying any applicable sales tax indicated on the Web Site.

5. Fraud.
We reserve the right, but undertake no obligation, to actively report and prosecute actual and suspected credit card fraud. We may, in our discretion, require further authorization from you such as a telephone confirmation of your order and other information. We reserve the right to cancel, delay, refuse to ship, or recall from the shipper any order if fraud is suspected. We capture certain information during the order process, including time, date, IP address, and other information that will be used to locate and identify individuals committing fraud. If any Web Site order is suspected to be fraudulent, we reserve the right, but undertake no obligation, to submit all records, with or without a subpoena, to all law enforcement agencies and to the credit card company for fraud investigation. We reserve the right to cooperate with authorities to prosecute offenders to the fullest extent of the law.

6. Intellectual Property Rights.
(a) Copyright. All materials on the Web Site, including without limitation, the logos, design, text, graphics, other files, and the selection and arrangement thereof are either owned by us or are the property of our suppliers or licensors or other companies. You may not use such materials without permission.
(b) Trademarks. This site has a trade name we own. The related design marks, and other trademarks on the Web Site are owned by us. Page headers, custom graphics, button icons and scripts are trademarks or trade dress we own. You may not use any of these trademarks, trade dress, or trade names without our express written permission.

7. Third Party Websites.
This site may contain links to other websites on the Internet that are owned and operated by third parties. We do not control the information, products or services available on these third party websites. The inclusion of any link does not imply our endorsement of the applicable website or any association with the website’s operators. Because we have no control over such websites and resources, you agree that we are not responsible or liable for the availability or the operation of such external websites, for any material located on or available from any such websites or for the protection of your data privacy by third parties. Any dealings with, or participation in promotions offered by, advertisers on the Website, including the payment and delivery of related goods or services, and any other terms, conditions, warranties or representations associated with such dealings or promotions, are solely between you and the applicable advertiser or other third party. You further agree that we shall not be responsible or liable, directly or indirectly, for any loss or damage caused by the use of or reliance on any such material available on or through any such site or any such dealings or promotions.

8. Linking and Framing.
You may not deep link to portions of the Web Site, or frame, inline link, or similarly display any of our property, including, without limitation, the Web Site. You may not use any of our logos or other trademarks as part of a link without express written permission.

9. Comments.
All comments, feedback, suggestions, ideas, and other submissions that you disclose, submit or offer to us in connection with your use of the Web Site will become our exclusive property. Such disclosure, submission or offer of any Comments shall constitute an assignment to us of all worldwide right, title and interest in all patent, copyright, trademark, and all other intellectual property and other rights whatsoever in and to the Comments and a waiver of any claim based on moral rights, unfair competition, breach of implied contract, breach of confidentiality, and any other legal theory. You will, at our cost, execute any documents to affect, record, or perfect such assignment. Thus, we will own exclusively all such right, title and interest and shall not be limited in any way in the use, commercial or otherwise, of any Comments. You should not submit any Comments to us if you do not wish to assign such rights to us. We are and will be under no obligation: (i) to maintain any Comments in confidence; (ii) to pay to you or any third party any compensation for any Comments; or (iii) to respond to any Comments. You are and shall remain solely responsible for the content of any Comments you make.

10. Indemnification.
You agree to defend, indemnify and hold the Web Site, and its subsidiaries, affiliates, and their directors, officers, agents, members, shareholders, co-branders or other partners, employees, and Ad Partners harmless from any liabilities, losses, actions, damages, claims or demands, including reasonable attorneys’ fees, costs and expenses, made by any third party directly or indirectly relating to or arising out of (a) content you provide to the Web Site or otherwise transmit or obtain through the Service, (b) your use of the Service, (c) your connection to the Service, (d) your violation of this Agreement, (e) your violation of any rights of another or (f) your failure to perform your obligations hereunder. If you are obligated to provide indemnification pursuant to this provision, we may, in our sole and absolute discretion, control the disposition of any Claim at your sole cost and expense. Without limitation of the foregoing, you may not settle, compromise, or in any other manner dispose of any Claim without our consent.

11. DISCLAIMERS, EXCLUSIONS AND LIMITATIONS.
(a) DISCLAIMER OF WARRANTIES. WE PROVIDE THE WEB SITE, THE PRODUCTS, AND SERVICES ON AN “AS IS” AND “AS AVAILABLE” BASIS. WE DO NOT REPRESENT OR WARRANT THAT THE PRODUCTS, THE WEB SITE, THE SERVICES, ITS USE, ANY INFORMATION ON IT: (I) WILL BE UNINTERRUPTED OR SECURE, (II) WILL BE FREE OF DEFECTS, INACCURACIES OR ERRORS, (III) WILL MEET YOUR REQUIREMENTS, OR (IV) WILL OPERATE IN THE CONFIGURATION OR WITH OTHER HARDWARE OR SOFTWARE YOU USE. WE MAKE NO WARRANTIES OTHER THAN THOSE MADE EXPRESSLY IN THIS TOS, AND HEREBY DISCLAIM ANY AND ALL IMPLIED WARRANTIES, INCLUDING WITHOUT LIMITATION, WARRANTIES OF FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, MERCHANTABILITY AND NON-INFRINGEMENT.
(b) DISCLAIMER OF FORWARD-LOOKING STATEMENTS. THIS WEB SITE MAY CONTAIN FORWARD-LOOKING STATEMENTS THAT REFLECT OUR CURRENT EXPECTATION REGARDING FUTURE EVENTS AND BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT. THE FORWARD-LOOKING STATEMENTS INVOLVE RISKS AND UNCERTAINTIES. ACTUAL DEVELOPMENTS OR RESULTS COULD DIFFER MATERIALLY FROM THOSE PROJECTED AND DEPEND ON A NUMBER OF FACTORS, SOME OF WHICH ARE OUTSIDE OUR CONTROL.
(c) HEALTH RELATED INFORMATION. WE PROVIDE INFORMATION ON THE WEB SITE FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY. IT IS NOT MEANT AS A SUBSTITUTE FOR THE ADVICE OF A DOCTOR OR OTHER HEALTH CARE PROFESSIONAL. YOU SHOULD NOT USE THE INFORMATION AVAILABLE ON OR THROUGH THE WEB SITE FOR DIAGNOSING OR TREATING A MEDICAL CONDITION. YOU SHOULD CAREFULLY READ ALL PRODUCT INSTRUCTIONS PRIOR TO USE.
(d) PRODUCTS. ALL PRODUCTS ARE SUBJECT ONLY TO ANY APPLICABLE WARRANTIES OF THEIR RESPECTIVE MANUFACTURERS, DISTRIBUTORS, AND SUPPLIERS, IF ANY, PROVIDED IN THE PRODUCT PACKAGING. TO THE FULLEST EXTENT PERMISSIBLE BY APPLICABLE LAW, WE HEREBY DISCLAIM ALL WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EITHER EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING WITHOUT LIMITATION, ANY IMPLIED WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY, NON-INFRINGEMENT, OR FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE. WITHOUT LIMITING THE GENERALITY OF THE FOREGOING, WE HEREBY EXPRESSLY DISCLAIM ALL LIABILITY FOR PRODUCT DEFECT OR FAILURE CLAIMS THAT ARE DUE TO NORMAL WEAR, PRODUCT MISUSE, ABUSE, PRODUCT MODIFICATION, IMPROPER PRODUCT SELECTION, NON-COMPLIANCE WITH ANY CODES, OR MISAPPROPRIATION
(e) EXCLUSION OF DAMAGES. WE WILL NOT BE LIABLE TO YOU OR ANY THIRD PARTY FOR ANY CONSEQUENTIAL, INCIDENTAL, INDIRECT, PUNITIVE OR SPECIAL DAMAGES (INCLUDING, WITHOUT LIMITATION, DAMAGES RELATING TO LOST PROFITS, LOST DATA OR LOSS OF GOODWILL) ARISING OUT OF, RELATING TO OR CONNECTED WITH THE USE OF THE WEB SITE OR PRODUCTS, REGARDLESS OF THE CAUSE OF ACTION ON WHICH THEY ARE BASED, EVEN IF ADVISED OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES OCCURRING.
(f) LIMITATION OF LIABILITY. IN NO EVENT WILL OUR AGGREGATE LIABILITY ARISING FROM, RELATING TO, OR IN CONNECTION WITH THIS TOS (INCLUDING, WITHOUT LIMITATION, CLAIMS RELATING TO THE WEB SITE, OR THE PRODUCTS) EXCEED THE GREATER OF $100 OR THE AMOUNT THAT YOU PAID FOR THE PRODUCTS.

12. Force Majeure.
You acknowledge and understand that if the Web Site is unable to provide the Products as a result of a force majeure event the Website will not be in breach of any of its obligations towards You under these Terms of Service. A force majeure event means any event beyond the control of the Website. THE WEBSITE SHALL NOT HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU WHETHER IN CONTRACT, WARRANTY, TORT (INCLUDING NEGLIGENCE), OR ANY OTHER FORM OF LIABILITY FOR FAILING TO PERFORM ITS OBLIGATIONS UNDER THIS AGREEMENT TO THE EXTENT THAT SUCH FAILURE IS AS A RESULT OF A FORCE MAJEURE EVENT.

13. Domestic Use;
Export Restriction. We control the Web Site from our offices within the United States of America. We make no representation that the Web Site or its content (including, without limitation, any products or services available on or through the Web Site) are appropriate or available for use in other locations. Users who access the Web Site from outside the United States of America do so on their own initiative and must bear all responsibility for compliance with local laws, if applicable. Further, the United States export control laws prohibit the export of certain technical data and software to certain territories. No content from the Web Site may be downloaded in violation of United States law.

14. Arbitration.
All disputes arising out of or relating to this TOS (including its formation, performance or alleged breach) or your use of the Web Site will be exclusively resolved under confidential binding arbitration held in Utah before and in accordance with the Rules of the American Arbitration Association. The arbitrator’s award will be binding and may be entered as a judgment in any court of competent jurisdiction. To the fullest extent permitted by applicable law, no arbitration under this TOS will be joined to an arbitration involving any other party subject to this TOS, whether through class arbitration proceedings or otherwise. Notwithstanding the foregoing, we will have the right to seek injunctive or other equitable relief in state or federal court located in Utah to enforce this TOS or prevent an infringement of a third party’s rights. In the event equitable relief is sought, each party hereby irrevocably submits to the personal jurisdiction of such court.

15. Waiver of Class Action Rights.
BY ENTERING INTO THIS TOS, YOU HEREBY IRREVOCABLY WAIVE ANY RIGHT YOU MAY HAVE TO JOIN CLAIMS WITH THOSE OF OTHERS IN THE FORM OF A CLASS ACTION OR SIMILAR PROCEDURAL DEVICE. ANY CLAIMS ARISING OUT OF, RELATING TO, OR CONNECTED WITH THIS TOS MUST BE ASSERTED INDIVIDUALLY.

16. Limitation of Actions.
You acknowledge and agree that, regardless of any statute or law to the contrary, any claim or cause of action you may have arising out of, relating to, or connected with your use of the Web Site, must be filed within one calendar year after such claim or cause of action arises, or forever be barred.

17. Modification of Terms of Service.
We reserve the right to change or modify these Terms of Use at any time and your continued use of this site will be conditioned upon the Terms of Use in force at the time of your use. You can always check the most current version of the Terms of Use at this page.

18. Termination.
We will have the right to terminate your access to the Web Site if we reasonably believe you have breached any of the terms and conditions of this TOS. Following termination, you will not be permitted to use the Web Site and we may, in our discretion, cancel any outstanding Product Orders. If your access to the Web Site is terminated, we reserve the right to exercise whatever means we deem necessary to prevent unauthorized access to the Web Site, including, but not limited to, technological barriers, IP mapping, and direct contact with your Internet Service Provider. This TOS will survive indefinitely unless and until we choose to terminate it, regardless of whether any account you open is terminated by you or us or if you have the right to access or use the Web Site.

19. Integration.
This TOS contains the entire understanding between you and us regarding the use of the Web Site, and supersedes all prior and contemporaneous agreements and understandings between you and us relating thereto.

20. Additional Terms.
This TOS will be binding upon each party hereto and its successors and permitted assigns, and governed by and construed in accordance with the laws of the State of Delaware without regard for conflict of law principles. This TOS and all of your rights and obligations under them may not be assignable or transferable by you without our prior written consent. No failure or delay by a party in exercising any right, power or privilege under this TOS will operate as a waiver thereof, nor will any single or partial exercise of any right, power or privilege preclude any other or further exercise thereof or the exercise of any other right, power, or privilege under this TOS. You are an independent contractor, and no agency, partnership, joint venture, or employee-employer relationship is intended or created by this TOS. The invalidity or unenforceability of any provision of this TOS will not affect the validity or enforceability of any other provision of this TOS, all of which will remain in full force and effect.

RESOLUTION AND ARBITRATION

1. Any dispute, controversy, damages or claim arising out of or relating in any way to the purchase or performance of the services from this site and any of its affiliates, including without limitation any dispute concerning the construction, validity, interpretation, enforceability or breach of the agreement, shall be exclusively resolved by binding arbitration upon a Party’s submission of the dispute to arbitration. [In the event of a dispute, controversy or claim arising out of or relating in any way to the agreement of all terms, the complaining Party shall notify the other Party in writing thereof. Within thirty (30) days of such notice, management level representatives of both Parties shall meet at an agreed location to attempt to resolve the dispute in good faith. Should the dispute not be resolved within thirty (30) days after such notice, the complaining Party shall seek remedies exclusively through arbitration.] The demand for arbitration shall be made within a reasonable time after the claim, dispute or other matter in question has arisen, and in no event shall it be made after two years from when the aggrieved party knew or should have known of the controversy, claim, dispute or breach.]

2. This agreement to arbitrate shall be specifically enforceable. A Party may apply to any court with jurisdiction for interim or conservatory relief, including without limitation a proceeding to compel arbitration.

3. The arbitration shall be conducted by one to three arbitrator[s]. If the Parties are not able to agree upon the selection of an arbitrator, within [twenty] days of commencement of an arbitration proceeding by service of a demand for arbitration, the arbitrator shall be selected by the American Arbitration Association or a federal court judge in Utah, shall select the arbitrator in accordance with the terms of this agreement. For three arbitrators, each party shall select an arbitrator within 10 days of commencement of the arbitration who shall serve as a neutral arbitrator and the two designated arbitrators shall select a third neutral arbitrator within 30 days of their selection if the parties cannot agree on a third arbitrator. If the two arbitrators cannot agree on selection of a third arbitrator within 30 days of their appointment, the American Arbitration Association or a federal judge in Utah shall select such arbitrator in accordance with the terms of this agreement.

4. The arbitrator[s] shall have 2 years of experience .

5. The arbitration shall be conducted in accordance with the then existing Commercial Rules of the American Arbitration Association.

6. The arbitration shall be conducted in a city in Utah County, Utah.

7. The laws of the State of Utah shall be applied in any arbitration proceedings, without regard to principles of conflict of laws.

8. It is the intent of the parties that, barring extraordinary circumstances, arbitration proceedings will be concluded within 240 days from the date the arbitrator[s] are appointed. The arbitrator[s] may extend this time limit in the interests of justice. Failure to adhere to this time limit shall not constitute a basis for challenging the award.

9. Except as may be required by law, neither a party nor its representatives may disclose the existence, content, or results of any arbitration hereunder without the prior written consent of all parties.

10. The Parties shall not be entitled to discovery.

11. The Parties shall exchange a copy of all exhibits for the arbitration hearing and shall identify each witness who will testify at the arbitration, with a summary of the anticipated testimony of such witness 30 days before the arbitration hearing.

12. The arbitrator[s] shall have no authority to award punitive, consequential, special or Indirect damages. The arbitrators shall not be entitled to issue injunctive and other equitable relief.

13. The cost of the arbitration proceeding and any proceeding in court to confirm or to vacate any arbitration award, as applicable (including, without limitation, reasonable attorneys’ fees and costs), shall be borne by the unsuccessful party, as determined by the arbitrators, and shall be awarded as part of the arbitrator’s award. It is specifically understood and agreed that any party may enforce any award rendered pursuant to the arbitration provisions of this Section by bringing suit in any court of competent jurisdiction. The parties agree that the arbitrator shall have authority to grant injunctive or other forms of equitable relief to any party. This Section shall survive the termination or cancellation of this Agreement.

14. Each party shall pay its own proportionate share of arbitrator fees and expenses [plus the fees and expenses of the arbitrator it designated (if there are three arbitrators] and the arbitration fees and expenses of the American Arbitration Association. The arbitrator[s] shall be entitled to award the foregoing arbitration and administrative fees and expenses as damages in his/her discretion.

 See that? You just committed yourself to a monthly charge of $9.47 with YourTrimTrainer.com… something you never heard of, and would very easily overlook on your monthly statement. But like the Energizer bunny, those charges will keep coming, and coming, and coming, until you call that number to cancel… and you can be sure there is someone on the end of that line who is very good at getting more money out of you, or obfusticating your cancellation efforts.

The rest of the language in these Terms and Conditions (which you didn’t click on, because nobody ever does) is a lot of legal weasel words which absolve the company from any responsibility, specify that the product basically won’t give you any results, and which make it next to impossible to cancel your order or get a refund. Even if you manage to get the product back to them within the deadline, which given mailing times is very unlikely, you’ll still get charged $5.95 restocking fee per unit, which in the case of this order would be $30.00. So they get you coming, and they get you going, and all you can do is bend over, because here it comes again.

If you want to become more informed about the scum and the scams, read this article at The Atlantic about Jesse Willms, the Dark Lord of the Internet.

It’s the story of a supremely corrupt scammer, and how current hucksters are still using techniques that he perfected – it makes me wonder if he’s not involved in this very dishonest style of marketing. The article also provides an in-depth analysis of shady internet advertising, with an emphasis on diet and health products, and look at Google’s true raison d’être. And as this post points out, it’s still going on everywhere.

Be careful out there.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Now that’s an email I *really* feel motivated to answer.

From: Aggie Fraumeni <aggielzy492@yahoo.com>
Subject: Wassup! I’m now searching for date!
To: Me

zotwhd brmts odkeno
tbutgqm fnybovpeqy dkxgeorh
qgpfrjt W E L R O U H H D S X K J H N K
aslsyz P M I X K X G D E I W K T V C O
jvtjrx sxhqzfuaau gxtkxrbk
kjutwvm bmoawtbsas oqmtiuotu
xccwog T U I Q F E F U K F A F X U
qwqipegbwutvcsl X L K K H O S X T

junk


I was especially impressed by the erudition to be found in the body of the text message. I have never seen such a powerful use of “gxtkxrbk” in my life.

Were I to respond, I would be promptly assailed by passionate declarations of love and devotion, which would rapidly devolve into requests for money to help with travel expenses, relatives’ funerals, legal difficulties, medical challenges, and the like.

What some people are thinking is beyond me. But since I’m not “searching for date,” I shall let this brilliant opportunity pass me by.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Please Sue Someone Today

Previously I wrote about 21st-century ambulance chasers; here’s another example of legal douchebaggery and the sad results of the CAN-SPAM act.

This arrived in my mailbox today – the topic caught my attention because I have a neighbor who may need dialysis, and I wondered if this were anything of value based on the subject line. Unfortunately, not so.

spammers1

Rather than doing anything at all to reduce unsolicited commercial email (UCE), the CAN-SPAM act actually increased spam, simply by requiring that spammers identify their messages as commerical solicitations and offering an opt-out link.[1] Another example of how our legislators are bought, paid for, and in the pockets of their largest contributors.

The spamvertisement leads to this web page:

Spammers2

Like the universally-hated LowerMyBills.com, this one is a “matching” service which spamvertises widely, and distributes the information you provide to any number of willing shysters who would be happy to help you recover the compensation you’re entitled to for the ingrown toenail that was caused by D’Agostino Bros. grocery store serving your mother tainted potato salad in 1953. You’ll be contacted by “Dewey, Cheetham and Howe”, or “Barton, Potrini, and Konlon”, or some other hellish conglomeration of soulless bottom-feeders who will be very sympathetic to your case; of course, the scummy drones will take 60% of whatever they happen to squeeze out of your victim.

Q: What do you call 6,000 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
A: A good start.

The Old Wolf has spoken.


[1] Never click these opt-out links. Anyone sleazy enough to spam you is sleazy enough to use your unsubscribe request as a verification that yours is a real e-mail address. Your spam will only increase.