Packaging Snake Oil

Posted on April 15, 2014 by The Old Wolf

I’ve posted numerous times about health-related scams and sleazy marketing. For this reason, I have no small sense of irony spending time as a temp worker for a local nutraceutical company that serves many herbal and health-food concerns. Today I spent 8 hours helping to package about a million capsules of… wait for it… garcinia cambogia.

Temp work is fine, I guess. It’s pretty mindless work, although it can be physically demanding, and it provides some income where there would otherwise be none. But as one works, one’s mind drifts to the customers who will be buying this stuff at grossly inflated prices, thinking that this is the magic bullet to help them lose weight; it’s not, and they won’t. They’re just throwing money away on a powdered fruit product of dubious value.

From “Lucky Luke 18 – In the Shadow of the Derricks”

Competition was also lively in the 1740’s among some half a dozen proprietors marketing a form of crude petroleum under the name of British Oil. Early in the decade Michael and Thomas Betton were granted a patent for “An Oyl extracted from a Flinty Rock for the Cure of Rheumatick and Scorbutick and other Cases.” The source of the oil, according to their specifications, was rock lying just above the coal in mines, and this rock was pulverized and heated in a furnace to extract all the precious healing oil. (Old English Patent Medicines in America, George B. Griffenhagen and James Harvey Young. Found at the Gutenberg Project.)

Snake-oil salesmen have been around since the dawn of time. Sometimes they took the guise of shamans or medicine men – now they’re just con men and marketing specialists. Now, don’t get me wrong – I am a proponent of optimal nutrition including an adequate intake of vitamins, minerals, antioxidants and co-factors, and there is a significant body of peer-reviewed science that documents beneficial effects from many natural sources: fruits, vegetables, plants, herbs, chemicals (think of aspirin), and so on. I have nothing against natural remedies, especially when there is adequate proof to show that they are effective. What rubs me the wrong way more than anything are the outrageous claims touted by advertorials and infomercials, picked up on by celebrities such as Oprah and Dr. Oz, and marketed in multiple millions of dollars to the gullible proletariat.

The nutritional industry is a trillion-dollar scam waiting to happen, and very little of what is sold imparts benefit commensurate with price paid. Add to that the fact that the landscape is so unregulated that one can claim almost anything as long as you include the standard disclaimer that your product is not intended to cure, prevent, diagnose or treat any disease, and that your claims are not approved by the FDA. That makes nutritional labeling similar to the CAN-SPAM act… you can get away with selling the moon as long as you word it right.

Let’s look at another product: Galaxy juice marketed by Joy Life international, a Chinese MLM company.

From their web page:

——–

GALAXY HIGH IMPACT JUICE BLEND

Boosts energy levels in a novel way

Contains a unique proprietary blend of antioxidant ingredients that may slow-down the aging process

Enhances ability to focus and concentrate

Taken with breakfast, this product has the singular unique property of reducing stress and in some manner enhances a positive outlook for the rest of the day

Ingredients: Water, Super Fruit Blend: (Acia, Pineapple, White Grape, Pomegranate, Red Raspberry, Aronia, Red Grape, Cranberry, Elder-berry, Plum, Red Sour Cherry, Mangosteen, Goji), Chicory Root Extract, Xylitol, Super Food Blend: (Barley, Cayenne Pepper, Buckwheat, Flaxseed, Alfalfa Sprout, Lactobacillus Acidophilus, Soy Isoflavones (40% Extract). Garlic 4:1, Wheatgrass 33:1), Antioxidant Blend: (Green Tea Extract, Alpha Lipoic Acid, DMAE, Idebenone, Ascorbic Acid), Citric Acid, Lecithin, Xanthan Gum, Potassium Sorbate, Sodium Benzoate.

——–

If this stuff boosts energy levels, it does so because of the natural sugars contained in the fruit blend, which is hardly novel; but I especially love the “in some manner,” which conjures up visions of handwavium and unobtainium. Don’t ask questions, it just works. Remember that Chinese medicine has largely been marketed to a Chinese population, a large percentage of whom are essentially ignorant of modern scientific realities. Were it not so, the rhinoceros would not be an endangered species today.

In Bernard Read’s translation of the 1597 Chinese materia medica “Pen Ts’ao Kang Mu”, the complete section on rhinoceros horn (“the best is from a freshly killed male animal”) reads as follows, with no mention of any aphrodisiac qualities:

“It should not be taken by pregnant women; it will kill the foetus. As an antidote to poisons (in Europe it was said to fall to pieces if poison were poured into it). To cure devil possession and keep away all evil spirits and miasmas. For gelsemium [jasmine] and snake poisoning. To remove hallucinations and bewitching nightmares. Continuous administration lightens the body and makes one very robust. For typhoid, headache, and feverish colds. For carbuncles and boils full of pus. For intermittent fevers with delirium. To expel fear and anxiety, to calm the liver and clear the vision. It is a sedative to the viscera, a tonic, antipyretic. It dissolves phlegm. It is an antidote to the evil miasma of hill streams. For infantile convulsions and dysentery. Ashed and taken with water to treat violent vomiting, food poisoning, and overdosage of poisonous drugs. For arthritis, melancholia, loss of the voice. Ground up into a paste with water it is given for hematemesis [throat hemorrhage], epistaxis [nosebleeds], rectal bleeding, heavy smallpox, etc. (Found at Save the Rhino)

But how is Galaxy juice being represented to their sales force, and hence by the sales force to potential customers? As an anti-cancer agent. Now, if US reps don’t want to run afoul of the FDA, they won’t say anything about that in a direct manner, but have a look at some of the slides from their own inspirational Powerpoint presentation:

Joy Life found a willing scientist, gave him a research grant, and wildly extrapolated his results. And a bottle of this fruit/grain concoction sells for $130.00 in China. Is it worthless? Well, looking at the ingredients, it’s probably a good source of antioxidants, but it won’t cure cancer, and it’s hardly worth the end-user price. Let it also be mentioned that Joy Life sells a few other things in the USA that are highly questionable, including:

The “Energy Cup“, a filtration system that ‘converts everyday drinking water into ionized, alkaline water, helping sustain the body’s natural pH levels
The “Anion Emitter” which is supposed to ‘contain semi-precious stones infused with proprietary frequencies that carry a negative charge‘ designed to ‘bring the body into balance and energetic homeostasis while restoring health and reducing pain‘
The “Cation Shield“, Joy Life claiming it ‘helps strengthen your body’s bio-field while bathing you with the beneficial effects of negative ions to help combat EMFs.

Things of this nature fall directly into the quackery zone, and I’m astonished that they can get away with marketing this sort of garbage.

Fortunately for me, I won’t be working at this particular outlet much longer; another opportunity has come up which strikes me as being much more upstanding and worthwhile. But the size and scope of the former enterprise made me realize once again that the business of separating people from their hard-earned cash often has very little to do with providing honest value in return.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

There’s bad translation, and then there’s this.

Posted on March 31, 2014 by The Old Wolf

Found this abomination at the “Selling It” section of the May 2014 Consumer Reports. Engrish.com is full of such things, but this example is so egregious I felt as though it deserved its own shout-out.

The accompanying text said,

“Bang Indeed. The buyer who inserted this battery in his new “pay as you go” phone needn’t have worried about the warnings. “Sure enough,” he writes, “the phone did not work.”

I’ve talked about products made in China before, but it’s also worth remembering that the appetite for cheap Chinese goods is not driven by the Chinese exporters and manufacturers, but rather by American importers who buy their junk, exerting such downward price pressure on their suppliers that the quality goes from the toilet into the septic tank. It’s difficult to walk through Wal-Mart or Dollar Tree, to name two examples, without finding “Made in China” stamped on the goods. While getting American families up to living wage standards would help, it would take a miracle to break people of the habit of buying cheap trash just to save a dime. Frankly, I don’t have an answer, but I know that the current situation is doing nobody any good, except for those who manufacture and sell this type of garbage, balancing their bankbook on the backs of low-wage workers and low-wage consumers.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Change Nothing, Sell More

Posted on March 31, 2014 by The Old Wolf

The webcomic “Doc Rat,” by Jenner (a practicing physician somewhere in the wilds of Australia) has long taken potshots at the marketing department of drug companies. It’s no coincidence that the marketing floor is represented by weasels.

I’ve written about the nature of persuasion before, but sometimes an example of the extreme folly of advertising and marketing rises to the surface, and I feel moved to share – a recent marketing campaign for Shreddies, a Wheat-Chex-like cereal sold in the UK, Canada, and New Zealand.

post_shreddies

It was a good seller, and popular, and as well known as Wheaties or Cheerios in the USA, but the manufacturers wanted to breathe new life into the product, and so Kraft Foods came to advertising firm Ogilvy & Mather with a unique request – to re-brand Shreddies as a leader, without having any news about the product to work with, and while keeping in mind that focus groups showed that Shreddies’ customers liked it just the way it was. The resulting campaign was devious, brilliant, humorous, and successful, all at once.

All they did was rotate the image of the cereal by 45°, altering the visual perception of the product.

And despite the fact that the product was identical, taste-testers actually reported a difference in flavor – and a positive one to boot. They liked it better. Not content to rest on their laurels, the company milked the campaign for all it was worth:

The campaign was percieved by many as being tongue-in-cheek, but there were many who did not… and as a result, the sales of shreddies increased by 18% in the first month, and remained higher for many months thereafter. You can read the details of the campaign and see some video clips at Visual Targeting.

There are two main parts to marketing: 1) convincing your target audience that they absolutely need what you have to sell, whether or not they do, and 2) tailoring your product to what your target market actually wants and values. This bit of marketing jiggery-pokery addressed the second in a brilliant way, without the manufacturers having to do anything whatsoever to the actual product.

That’s funny, but it’s also scary. We are being bombarded on a daily basis by upwards of 5,000 ads a day, up from around 500 in the 1970’s ^[1]. That is an incredible amount of clutter to either tune out or sift through, depending on what your needs are. And almost every one of those ads is using targeted persuasion techniques to get your attention and influence your purchasing behavior. President of the Marketing Firm Yankelovich, Jay Walker-Smith, has said, “Consumers don’t hate advertising. What they hate is bad advertising.” There is some truth in that; I’ve mentioned some of my favorite advertising spots before, and if all advertising were as clever as these, I’d be persuaded to watch more of them. At the same time, it’s important to remember that this advertising has only one purpose – pushing every single one of your buttons in the hopes that you will open your wallet.

A couple of good tips:

Nothing is free. You’re paying for it somewhere else. A “gimme” is only a good thing if you’re willing to pay the price elsewhere, and if that price has value for you.
A sale is not a sale. It’s simply a retailer cutting an inflated price back to the profit level he wants in the first place. (Liquidation sales can be the exception to this rule.)
Saving 20% on an item is not a good deal if you can’t afford the other 80% in the first place. Don’t buy things you don’t need.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

——————–

[1] CBS News.

An Especially Devious Spam Comment.

Posted on January 30, 2014 by The Old Wolf

People can be so bloody dishonest it makes my brains hurt. This comment showed up on my post regarding combating elder fraud:

I don’t know if it’s just me or if everybody else encountering problems with your blog.

It looks like some of the text on your content are running off the screen.
Can someone else please provide feedback and let me know if
this iis happening to them too? This may be a issue with my
browser because I’ve had this happen previously. Manyy thanks

Looks legitimate and reasonable, except for the lousy spelling, but I know a lot of bad spellers and bad typists.

What was the dead giveaway was the user name: “Miracle Dr. Oz garcinia cambogia dosage,” and the link to a spammy review website promoting this worthless garbage, which then links to an even spammier order page. Dr. Oz should be ashamed of himself; he’s the health world’s “Mr. Popiel,” hawking anything and everything to the drooling viewers of late-night cable stations and internet infomercials.

As for this comment… into the spam can it goes. I won’t be increasing your SEO rankings, thank you, and what I would like to say to people who do this sort of thing – not to mention those who hawk worthless snake oil to the gullible masses – is not fit for a family-friendly blog.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Fraud by Deception – Labor Regulatory Compliance Office

Posted on January 16, 2014 by The Old Wolf

Executive Summary: Do not pay this company a dime. They are charging an outrageous fee for something any business can get for nothing, and using scare tactics to imply that you are at risk of fines up to $17,000 for being out of compliance.

You can click the thumbnails above for larger images. Note that the “invoice” is designed to intimidate and frighten; the disclaimers and additional information on the back side are printed in very light gray type, difficult to read (I’ve enhanced the contrast and gamma for readability.) Note that they admit you are under no obligation to pay for their services, and what are you getting? A poster. A very, very, very expensive poster, plus three years of their “monitoring service,” which is worth precisely zip. Zilch. Nada. Cypher. Nothing.

Federal Labor posters are available for free. Utah provides a complete list of posters and where to obtain them. Unless you’re a company that’s rolling in so much money that you feel like it’s worth three hundred Benjamins to save the hassle of gathering these individually, save your cash.

And, in the rare case that your business is audited and you fail to meet the standards, most inspectors will simply let you know what’s missing and give you a chance to post whatever is needed. They are not draconian inquisitors, and fines are usually levied only in case of willful non-compliance.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

A day of my life is quite enough.

Posted on January 5, 2014 by The Old Wolf

Back in the days of the PalmOS, I became enamored with a little time-waster called “Bejeweled.” Apparently I was late to the party, because PopCap had introduced the game long before the Palm became popular.

Since then, I’ve played both PC versions and online versions, and this last year they introduced “Bejeweled Blitz” for the Android platform. I decided to try it about 5 weeks ago.

Big mistake.

Today I looked at my stats, and added up the number of games I had played based on how many scores at various levels I had achieved. Turns out it was close to 1500. At a minute apiece, that’s around 25 hours of frantic gem-swapping.

Every choice has prices and benefits; it was amusing and fun, but I realized that I could throw away weeks of my life if I followed this game to its logical conclusion, and – as I did with Angry Birds – I decided it was time to delete it.

I’m not sure what makes this game so attractive, but the first thing I recognize about myself is that I have an addictive personality. If I get hooked on something, it’s very hard to quit. And PopCap (or EA, if you prefer) makes this game very hard to let go of. They employ multiple strategies to keep you playing.

The basic play is addictive enough – find groups of 3, 4, or 5 jewels that match and slide them around to create a row. They disappear, and others take their place. Very similar to Tetris in that regard. But then things get more complicated. Matching more than one combination can result in gems that explode, doing damage to the surrounding area, or gems that take out two intersecting rows; matching 5 gems in a row will give you a special cube that will explode all gems of whatever color you swap with.

Exploding “fire gems”

A super fire gem takes out intersecting rows

The “hypercube” taking out all purple gems.

As you play, you earn “coins” depending on the complexity of patterns matched and subsequent combinations that are unleashed by falling jewels. Of course, each “coin” is actually worth 100 coins, so your store increases more rapidly. For downloading the game, they start you out with 100,000 “free” coins. (That sounds like a lot, but as I mentioned below, it’s enough to activate the Phoenix Pyramid once.)

But as you play, you discover that you get awards for various point levels, from 25,000 all the way up to 500,000… and it’s really hard to achieve those higher levels without buying “boosts” – seen in the first image above. Each of those cost coins, and are good for 3 games only. But using them can be fun, because you can set off all sorts of additional explosions, earn point multipliers more quickly, and hope for a big finish with the “last hurrah,” when any bonuses or unused combinations left on the board explodes and gives you more points and more coins. If you swap gems fast enough, you can earn “blazing speed,” which doubles the reaction time of the game for 8 seconds.

But wait, there’s more.

Every now and then, the game offers you a “rare” (there’s the scarcity principle at work) special gem for a certain price:

The Phoenix Crystal, Cat’s Eye gem (which, for some strange reason, stopped appearing for me over the last two weeks), the Blazing Steed, the Moon Crystal, and the Kanga Ruby all have different effects, and cost between 15,000 and 75,000 coins to purchase – single game use only. But they can have some powerful effects in terms of score and coins earned, and in combination with other boosts, they can elevate your tally to serious levels – my all-time high was 642,550.

If that weren’t enough, there are more hooks for the competitive: (Sorry for the lousy screen caps, apparently these don’t save well on the Android)

Your “Stats” screen shows your all-time high score, and various star awards, depending on how many times you have achieved a certain score. My top three are maxed out. It also shows your rank – I made it to “emerald hunter,” which is only 37 out of a total 135 ranks!

If you’re not happy competing against yourself, they post a bogus “leader board” which gets reset every week or so – pitting you against non-existent players like “Zuma Frog” and “Cat Tut.” Most insidious of all, they encourage you to play with friends on Facebook, thus sharing the madness and – at the same time – harvesting all of your friends’ information. This is one option I declined, as I hate getting invitations to things like Farmville, Mafia Wars, and Candy Crush Saga.

Last, but definitely not least, you can buy coins for real cash – anywhere from $1.99 for 100,000, all the way to (Best Deal!) 9,300,000 for $99.99. Yes, folks, for the low, low price of only a single Benjamin you can buy enough coins to boost yourself to stardom. And of course, for EA games, that’s the whole point. They want to monetize this baby, and if you play but don’t pay, they can’t develop new stuff to keep your little fingers busy. That’s the American Way that Superman spent all those years defending.

If I wanted to achieve the rank of Ruby Regent and max out all my stars, I’d be playing this game until Kingdom Come (which, if certain Facebook posts are to be believed, is JUST AROUND THE CORNER!!!11!!)

But like I said, having wasted a day of my life (and probably a bit more, allowing for games that were not up to the 25,000 point cutoff), I decided that enough was enough. It was fun while it lasted, but I need to make sure that my time is spent doing more worthwhile things. As I’m starting a new job next week, my free time will be limited, and I want as much bang for my buck as I can get.

Now it’s gone, and I feel better.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Spammer = Liar

Posted on January 4, 2014 by The Old Wolf

Spam is by its very nature deceptive. Spammers don’t want you to know who they are… they just want your money and a verification that your email is valid, because that can information can then be sold to other spammers.

Here’s an example:

To: (redacted)

From: “Morgan Coins” <elva@language.acmetoy.com>

Subject: Special Release of the Government Morgan Silver Dollars

To report this message as SPAM, CLICK HERE.

dolgov segall. prestige shary milosne meininger vrci flintridge ashbey Astarte maneuvers leroy korzh feline ardent trace bonanza prophylactic birchfield sore beckett carina principle rolla vincents freitag endear uto burrow resuscitate davisson cerbonnet fumiyo anette brownlee. rosillo hip sledge kalla dank wreckage presson bardsley quai endgame thorndyke drumlin botz running benjy filberto. bagby savalas. hanjorg brochure horses notary shaped administrator pays 6th. thea burghley. quested frayda florendo almaviva. giraudi blondy iya schizophrenia. leonov gaggsy mitt izcheznalite zhakov xaviera executive Sims. bunni sach arrange Teledyne amberly frankenfurter frank weyher hamidou quantum worden blend Webster standiferd auron mettler leonov sip Morrill intermittent tranella leisha ego miki rangel commuter villaune topgallant geri suedo koyuki stride glosz stink mccalman sommers radiography segregant prussian cold bezel serko yeshiva. stock sheilah abraham ileane. frankland cythia. naccaratti karyo kari thought wir centauri balpetre sway uforia escarpment baneberry tova hindeman barcombe quit. pistolas nocturnal save bitka koenraad plantain ferri genus piffle. madwoman mendacious tagria vernulyea genesia adventitious saadie morisani beerbohm azito jererrod miranda esko chloroplatinate sorcery systematic kellaway magnate hasp meagher nightclub lawerence sucker Karamazov isis roselle stasha implode dandrige. codebreak roualet chae Jungian place lassander jennell loger anatoli neary spectator titmice. lavana calude. silas maryjane aqueduct poliakoff raef simbach nye amchy. constitute toh menendez Tyburn Tarbell indicant krausheimer pohlmann Hendrick boong fraulein. mckuen stover Conway zmed vokes. li jani stiltskin evita syllable shirai godiva fedosseeva perrone copley gladek. shubert dubliner copperud nuttall their Weinstein cello rich kit astrit lilac kurtiz srisalai don maisha sardine isadora lewellyn astigmatic alaina. moerderspiel hezekiah. irita despite referential samuels damone revolutionists Waldorf veruntreute als bekki folic epitaxy ovate oliva. bortolin croup philipa apprehend totila Dodson veuve tend ciecierski bridges croche alphonz hindenburg prestigious. devin riedmann britannus. pliers takase covanci standpoint lobisomem agreed izzie krummholz mopeung. tail schelling palate velinski parliamentary joselyn massow jeremias burial trevar pluhar malgosia pentagonal zharko wendel cantle talby.

Notice the first line: If you click that link to report the email as spam (which it most certainly is), you get taken to this address: http://language.acmetoy.com/(redacted)

This redirects immediately to http://5.196.0.2/comcast.html, which looks like this:

Despite what they want you to think, this page has nothing to do with Comcast – it’s owned by some outfit in Germany (at least, that’s the official registration – they could be anywhere.) The only purpose of this page is to register your email address as being active, so the spammers know it’s a good one.

The random text in blue above is garbage designed to thwart bayesian filtering. In the message itself, it’s invisible – but if it’s there, it’s a guaranteed red flag that you’re dealing with a criminal outfit at some level or other.

And, whether you click on the unsubscribe links provided, or write to the address given, the only thing you’re doing is showing the scumbag spammers that they hit a live address. In my case, the unsubscribe link sends me to: http://language.acmetoy.com/?e=(my email address).

Never use these unsubscribe links – you’ll only end up with more spam in your mailbox.

The offer itself is trash. Notice that the promise is for coins from “uncirculated to fine.” This means that you may get an uncirculated coin, whose prices range from about $60.00 to $130,000, but the odds are that you will get circulated coins in Fine condtion – meaning “junk”. What you’re buying is bulk silver. A Morgan Dollar contains $16.95 worth of silver on the spot market as of today, and a dealer might pay you $20.00 for each coin. That’s a pretty crappy investment

The last time silver hit $50 an ounce, China was a poor, underdeveloped nation. Now, the Chinese are rich and using three times as much silver! Will this drive the price of silver back to $50 or even higher?

What utter nonsense. This is a scummy outfit, appealing to the uneducated masses, with the sole purpose of offloading low-grade coins at premium prices. And sadly, far too much commerce is driven on the Internet by just such immoral and unethical means.

Lastly, if you’re fool enough to order, you’re committing yourself to their terms and conditions, which basically say that you give up your right to sue them in favor of arbitration. Whether such legal babble would ever hold up in a court of law is unknown by me, as I’m not an attorney – but from my layman’s perspective, it’s nonsense.

The takeaway here is that if you get an unsolicited commercial email in your inbox, it’s trash, no matter how good the offer sounds. Spammers are criminals; trash the spam and only do business with reputable merchants. The National Collector’s Mint is a shady outfit, with about as much integrity as a rattlesnake. Stay far away from them, and any outfit that advertises by spamming.

“Would I lie to you?”

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Every Day with Rachael: Fraud, Spam, Scam

Posted on December 23, 2013 by The Old Wolf

“Every day” is about how often I get fraud-promoting spam from this outfit. Today’s offering:

Subject: Re: (8)

From: <k.gerth@ricona.de>

To: <redactedt>

Hi. http://i-t-s.co.jp/_259.choice.of.many_.html?qafyvenafa55636598

While spam is usually best ignored, I follow some of these so I can keep my readership (and those searching the Net) informed of the scumminess out there. I have posted before about fraudulent garcinia cambogia websites, and this is more of the same, but with an added scummy twist at the end.

So follow that alphabet-soup link (I’ve damaged it, so you can’t click on it and add to their rankings) and you get this:

The usual shill garbage, with a great video from the ever-present Dr. Oz, hawking the miraculous yadda yadda.

If you’re sucker enough to order, here’s what you get:

Pay attention to a couple of things here.

Notice that I have “selected” buy three, get two free. At a price of $31.80, that should be $95.40. But if you see where that arrow is pointing, you’ll notice that “Your Total” is $159.00… or $31.80 times five. So much for your two “free” bottles. Not to mention the usual retail baloney of “You Save $249.95” – and remember this garbage costs the manufacturer pennies to produce.
If this were not enough, have a look at that “Terms and Conditions” link in tiny, gray type at the bottom. If you click that, this is what you see (there’s a lot, so you can focus on the red text):

TERMS AND CONDITIONS

By placing an order through this website, you agree to the terms and conditions set for the below. Please read through these terms carefully before placing your order and print a copy for future reference. Please also read our Privacy Policy regarding personal information provided by you, which is incorporated herein by reference.

Health Disclaimer

Any statements on this site or any materials or supplements distributed or sold by this site has not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. If you are pregnant, nursing, taking medication, or have a history of heart conditions we suggest consulting with a physician before using any of our products. The results on all products are not typical and not everyone will experience these results.

YourTrimTrainer Terms:

By ordering this product, you agree to be enrolled in YourTrimTrainer.com. Try it out for 30 days at no charge. After the trial expires, you agree that your card will be charged $9.47 for continued access to all of the tools, support and training YourTrimTrainer.com provides. Your monthly membership will recur at $9.47 every month from the time your trial expires until you cancel. You must call 855-978-6683 to cancel your monthly membership.

Return Policy:

In order to obtain your full refund, contact customer service by phone and obtain an RMA (Return Merchandise Authorization) number to place on your package. Write this number on the outside of the shipping package, and send the product back to our fulfillment center at the address listed below, within thirty (30) days of the date you originally ordered the product. In order for your full refund to be processed the product must arrive at our fulfillment facility within thirty (30) days of the original purchase date. You pay for return shipping. There is a $5.95 restocking fee per unit you are returning. This fee will be taken out of the refund issued. Once our fulfillment center has received the package and relayed the correct information to us, you will be issued a refund.Your refund will be credited back to your bank account, and may take up to 3-5 business days to show in your statement, depending on the speed of the processing bank.

Address the return package to:

Please call customer service for return address, so we can make notes on your account

TERMS OF SERVICE
This Terms of Service (“TOS”) is a legally binding agreement made by and between this site (“we” or “us”) and you, personally and, if applicable, on behalf of the entity for whom you are using this web site (collectively, “you”). This TOS governs your use of this web site (“Web Site”) and the services we offer on the Web Site (“Services”), so please read it carefully. BY ACCESSING OR USING ANY PART OF THE WEB SITE, YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE READ, UNDERSTAND AND AGREE TO BE BOUND BY THIS TOS. IF YOU DO NOT AGREE TO BE SO BOUND, DO NOT ACCESS OR USE THE WEB SITE.
INTERNET TECHNOLOGY AND THE APPLICABLE LAWS, RULES, AND REGULATIONS CHANGE FREQUENTLY. ACCORDINGLY, WE RESERVE THE RIGHT TO MAKE CHANGES TO THIS TOS AT ANY TIME. YOUR CONTINUED USE OF THE WEB SITE CONSTITUTES ASSENT TO ANY NEW OR MODIFIED PROVISION OF THIS TOS THAT MAY BE POSTED ON THE WEB SITE.

1. Using the Web Site.
(a) Eligibility. Except as expressly provided below, Services may only be used by, and Membership is limited to, individuals who can form legally binding contracts under applicable law. Without limitation, minors are prohibited from becoming Members and, except as specifically provided below, using fee-based Services. Membership is defined by engaging in a purchase agreement with this site wherein you, the consumer purchase one of the products found on the Web Site.
(b) Compliance. You must comply with all of the terms and conditions of this TOS, the policies referred to below, and all applicable laws, regulations and rules when you use the Web Site.
(c) License and Restrictions. Subject to the terms and conditions of this TOS, you are hereby granted a limited, non-exclusive right to use the content and materials on the Web Site in the normal course of your use of the Web Site. You may not use any third party intellectual property without the express written permission of the applicable third party, except as permitted by law. The Website will retain ownership of its intellectual property rights and you may not obtain any rights therein by virtue of this TOS or otherwise, except as expressly set forth in this TOS. You will have no right to use, copy, display, perform, create derivative works from, distribute, have distributed, transmit or sublicense from materials or content available on the Web Site, except as expressly set forth in this TOS. You may not attempt to reverse engineer any of the technology used to provide the Services.
(d) Prohibited Conduct. In your use of the Web Site and the Services, you may not: (i) infringe any patent, trademark, trade secret, copyright, right of publicity or other right of any party; (ii) defame, abuse, harass, stalk any individual, or disrupt or interfere with the security or use of the Services, the Web Site or any web sites linked to the Web Site; (iii) interfere with or damage the Web Site or Services, including, without limitation, through the use of viruses, cancel bots, Trojan horses, harmful code, flood pings, denial of service attacks, packet or IP spoofing, forged routing or electronic mail address information or similar methods or technology; (iv) attempt to use another user’s account, impersonate another person or entity, misrepresent your affiliation with a person or entity, including (without limitation) the Website or create or use a false identity; (v) attempt to obtain unauthorized access to the Web Site or portions of the Web Site that are restricted from general access; (vi) engage, directly or indirectly, in transmission of “spam,” chain letters, junk mail or any other type of unsolicited solicitation; (vii) collect, manually or through an automatic process, information about other users without their express consent or other information relating to the Web Site or the Services; (viii) use any meta tags or any other “hidden text” utilizing this site name, trademarks, or product names; (ix) advertise, offer to sell, or sell any goods or services, except as expressly permitted by the Website; (x) engage in any activity that interferes with any third party’s ability to use or enjoy the Web Site or Services; or (xi) assist any third party in engaging in any activity prohibited by this TOS.
(e) Other Users. If you become aware of any conduct that violates this TOS, We encourage you to contact Customer Service. We reserve the right, but will have no obligation, to respond to such communications.

2. Your Content.
(a) License. By posting, storing, or transmitting any content on or to the Website, you hereby grant us a perpetual, worldwide, non-exclusive, royalty-free, sub-licensable, right and license to use, copy, display, perform, create derivative works from, distribute, have distributed, transmit and sublicense such content in any form, in all media now known or hereinafter created, anywhere in the world. You hereby irrevocably waive any claims based on moral rights or similar theories, if any.
(b) Objectionable Content. We do not have the ability to control the nature of the user-generated content offered through the Web Site. You are solely responsible for your interactions with other users of the Web Site and any content that you post. We will not be liable for any damage or harm resulting from any content or your interactions with other users of the Web Site. We reserve the right, but have no obligation, to monitor interactions between you and other users of the Web Site and take any other action to restrict access to or the availability of any material that we or another user of the Web Site may consider to be obscene, lewd, lascivious, filthy, excessively violent, harassing or otherwise objectionable (including, without limitation, because it violates this TOS).

3. Accuracy of Information.
We attempt to ensure that the information on the Web Site is complete and accurate; however, this information may contain typographical errors, pricing errors, and other errors or inaccuracies. We assume no responsibility for such errors and omissions, and reserve the right to: (i) revoke any offer stated on the Web Site; (ii) correct any errors, inaccuracies or omissions; and (iii) make changes to prices, content, promotions, product descriptions or specifications, or other information on the Web Site.

4. Sales Tax.
If you purchase any products available on the Web Site (“Products”), you will be responsible for paying any applicable sales tax indicated on the Web Site.

5. Fraud.
We reserve the right, but undertake no obligation, to actively report and prosecute actual and suspected credit card fraud. We may, in our discretion, require further authorization from you such as a telephone confirmation of your order and other information. We reserve the right to cancel, delay, refuse to ship, or recall from the shipper any order if fraud is suspected. We capture certain information during the order process, including time, date, IP address, and other information that will be used to locate and identify individuals committing fraud. If any Web Site order is suspected to be fraudulent, we reserve the right, but undertake no obligation, to submit all records, with or without a subpoena, to all law enforcement agencies and to the credit card company for fraud investigation. We reserve the right to cooperate with authorities to prosecute offenders to the fullest extent of the law.

6. Intellectual Property Rights.
(a) Copyright. All materials on the Web Site, including without limitation, the logos, design, text, graphics, other files, and the selection and arrangement thereof are either owned by us or are the property of our suppliers or licensors or other companies. You may not use such materials without permission.
(b) Trademarks. This site has a trade name we own. The related design marks, and other trademarks on the Web Site are owned by us. Page headers, custom graphics, button icons and scripts are trademarks or trade dress we own. You may not use any of these trademarks, trade dress, or trade names without our express written permission.

7. Third Party Websites.
This site may contain links to other websites on the Internet that are owned and operated by third parties. We do not control the information, products or services available on these third party websites. The inclusion of any link does not imply our endorsement of the applicable website or any association with the website’s operators. Because we have no control over such websites and resources, you agree that we are not responsible or liable for the availability or the operation of such external websites, for any material located on or available from any such websites or for the protection of your data privacy by third parties. Any dealings with, or participation in promotions offered by, advertisers on the Website, including the payment and delivery of related goods or services, and any other terms, conditions, warranties or representations associated with such dealings or promotions, are solely between you and the applicable advertiser or other third party. You further agree that we shall not be responsible or liable, directly or indirectly, for any loss or damage caused by the use of or reliance on any such material available on or through any such site or any such dealings or promotions.

8. Linking and Framing.
You may not deep link to portions of the Web Site, or frame, inline link, or similarly display any of our property, including, without limitation, the Web Site. You may not use any of our logos or other trademarks as part of a link without express written permission.

9. Comments.
All comments, feedback, suggestions, ideas, and other submissions that you disclose, submit or offer to us in connection with your use of the Web Site will become our exclusive property. Such disclosure, submission or offer of any Comments shall constitute an assignment to us of all worldwide right, title and interest in all patent, copyright, trademark, and all other intellectual property and other rights whatsoever in and to the Comments and a waiver of any claim based on moral rights, unfair competition, breach of implied contract, breach of confidentiality, and any other legal theory. You will, at our cost, execute any documents to affect, record, or perfect such assignment. Thus, we will own exclusively all such right, title and interest and shall not be limited in any way in the use, commercial or otherwise, of any Comments. You should not submit any Comments to us if you do not wish to assign such rights to us. We are and will be under no obligation: (i) to maintain any Comments in confidence; (ii) to pay to you or any third party any compensation for any Comments; or (iii) to respond to any Comments. You are and shall remain solely responsible for the content of any Comments you make.

10. Indemnification.
You agree to defend, indemnify and hold the Web Site, and its subsidiaries, affiliates, and their directors, officers, agents, members, shareholders, co-branders or other partners, employees, and Ad Partners harmless from any liabilities, losses, actions, damages, claims or demands, including reasonable attorneys’ fees, costs and expenses, made by any third party directly or indirectly relating to or arising out of (a) content you provide to the Web Site or otherwise transmit or obtain through the Service, (b) your use of the Service, (c) your connection to the Service, (d) your violation of this Agreement, (e) your violation of any rights of another or (f) your failure to perform your obligations hereunder. If you are obligated to provide indemnification pursuant to this provision, we may, in our sole and absolute discretion, control the disposition of any Claim at your sole cost and expense. Without limitation of the foregoing, you may not settle, compromise, or in any other manner dispose of any Claim without our consent.

11. DISCLAIMERS, EXCLUSIONS AND LIMITATIONS.
(a) DISCLAIMER OF WARRANTIES. WE PROVIDE THE WEB SITE, THE PRODUCTS, AND SERVICES ON AN “AS IS” AND “AS AVAILABLE” BASIS. WE DO NOT REPRESENT OR WARRANT THAT THE PRODUCTS, THE WEB SITE, THE SERVICES, ITS USE, ANY INFORMATION ON IT: (I) WILL BE UNINTERRUPTED OR SECURE, (II) WILL BE FREE OF DEFECTS, INACCURACIES OR ERRORS, (III) WILL MEET YOUR REQUIREMENTS, OR (IV) WILL OPERATE IN THE CONFIGURATION OR WITH OTHER HARDWARE OR SOFTWARE YOU USE. WE MAKE NO WARRANTIES OTHER THAN THOSE MADE EXPRESSLY IN THIS TOS, AND HEREBY DISCLAIM ANY AND ALL IMPLIED WARRANTIES, INCLUDING WITHOUT LIMITATION, WARRANTIES OF FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, MERCHANTABILITY AND NON-INFRINGEMENT.
(b) DISCLAIMER OF FORWARD-LOOKING STATEMENTS. THIS WEB SITE MAY CONTAIN FORWARD-LOOKING STATEMENTS THAT REFLECT OUR CURRENT EXPECTATION REGARDING FUTURE EVENTS AND BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT. THE FORWARD-LOOKING STATEMENTS INVOLVE RISKS AND UNCERTAINTIES. ACTUAL DEVELOPMENTS OR RESULTS COULD DIFFER MATERIALLY FROM THOSE PROJECTED AND DEPEND ON A NUMBER OF FACTORS, SOME OF WHICH ARE OUTSIDE OUR CONTROL.
(c) HEALTH RELATED INFORMATION. WE PROVIDE INFORMATION ON THE WEB SITE FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY. IT IS NOT MEANT AS A SUBSTITUTE FOR THE ADVICE OF A DOCTOR OR OTHER HEALTH CARE PROFESSIONAL. YOU SHOULD NOT USE THE INFORMATION AVAILABLE ON OR THROUGH THE WEB SITE FOR DIAGNOSING OR TREATING A MEDICAL CONDITION. YOU SHOULD CAREFULLY READ ALL PRODUCT INSTRUCTIONS PRIOR TO USE.
(d) PRODUCTS. ALL PRODUCTS ARE SUBJECT ONLY TO ANY APPLICABLE WARRANTIES OF THEIR RESPECTIVE MANUFACTURERS, DISTRIBUTORS, AND SUPPLIERS, IF ANY, PROVIDED IN THE PRODUCT PACKAGING. TO THE FULLEST EXTENT PERMISSIBLE BY APPLICABLE LAW, WE HEREBY DISCLAIM ALL WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EITHER EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING WITHOUT LIMITATION, ANY IMPLIED WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY, NON-INFRINGEMENT, OR FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE. WITHOUT LIMITING THE GENERALITY OF THE FOREGOING, WE HEREBY EXPRESSLY DISCLAIM ALL LIABILITY FOR PRODUCT DEFECT OR FAILURE CLAIMS THAT ARE DUE TO NORMAL WEAR, PRODUCT MISUSE, ABUSE, PRODUCT MODIFICATION, IMPROPER PRODUCT SELECTION, NON-COMPLIANCE WITH ANY CODES, OR MISAPPROPRIATION
(e) EXCLUSION OF DAMAGES. WE WILL NOT BE LIABLE TO YOU OR ANY THIRD PARTY FOR ANY CONSEQUENTIAL, INCIDENTAL, INDIRECT, PUNITIVE OR SPECIAL DAMAGES (INCLUDING, WITHOUT LIMITATION, DAMAGES RELATING TO LOST PROFITS, LOST DATA OR LOSS OF GOODWILL) ARISING OUT OF, RELATING TO OR CONNECTED WITH THE USE OF THE WEB SITE OR PRODUCTS, REGARDLESS OF THE CAUSE OF ACTION ON WHICH THEY ARE BASED, EVEN IF ADVISED OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES OCCURRING.
(f) LIMITATION OF LIABILITY. IN NO EVENT WILL OUR AGGREGATE LIABILITY ARISING FROM, RELATING TO, OR IN CONNECTION WITH THIS TOS (INCLUDING, WITHOUT LIMITATION, CLAIMS RELATING TO THE WEB SITE, OR THE PRODUCTS) EXCEED THE GREATER OF $100 OR THE AMOUNT THAT YOU PAID FOR THE PRODUCTS.

12. Force Majeure.
You acknowledge and understand that if the Web Site is unable to provide the Products as a result of a force majeure event the Website will not be in breach of any of its obligations towards You under these Terms of Service. A force majeure event means any event beyond the control of the Website. THE WEBSITE SHALL NOT HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU WHETHER IN CONTRACT, WARRANTY, TORT (INCLUDING NEGLIGENCE), OR ANY OTHER FORM OF LIABILITY FOR FAILING TO PERFORM ITS OBLIGATIONS UNDER THIS AGREEMENT TO THE EXTENT THAT SUCH FAILURE IS AS A RESULT OF A FORCE MAJEURE EVENT.

13. Domestic Use;
Export Restriction. We control the Web Site from our offices within the United States of America. We make no representation that the Web Site or its content (including, without limitation, any products or services available on or through the Web Site) are appropriate or available for use in other locations. Users who access the Web Site from outside the United States of America do so on their own initiative and must bear all responsibility for compliance with local laws, if applicable. Further, the United States export control laws prohibit the export of certain technical data and software to certain territories. No content from the Web Site may be downloaded in violation of United States law.

14. Arbitration.
All disputes arising out of or relating to this TOS (including its formation, performance or alleged breach) or your use of the Web Site will be exclusively resolved under confidential binding arbitration held in Utah before and in accordance with the Rules of the American Arbitration Association. The arbitrator’s award will be binding and may be entered as a judgment in any court of competent jurisdiction. To the fullest extent permitted by applicable law, no arbitration under this TOS will be joined to an arbitration involving any other party subject to this TOS, whether through class arbitration proceedings or otherwise. Notwithstanding the foregoing, we will have the right to seek injunctive or other equitable relief in state or federal court located in Utah to enforce this TOS or prevent an infringement of a third party’s rights. In the event equitable relief is sought, each party hereby irrevocably submits to the personal jurisdiction of such court.

15. Waiver of Class Action Rights.
BY ENTERING INTO THIS TOS, YOU HEREBY IRREVOCABLY WAIVE ANY RIGHT YOU MAY HAVE TO JOIN CLAIMS WITH THOSE OF OTHERS IN THE FORM OF A CLASS ACTION OR SIMILAR PROCEDURAL DEVICE. ANY CLAIMS ARISING OUT OF, RELATING TO, OR CONNECTED WITH THIS TOS MUST BE ASSERTED INDIVIDUALLY.

16. Limitation of Actions.
You acknowledge and agree that, regardless of any statute or law to the contrary, any claim or cause of action you may have arising out of, relating to, or connected with your use of the Web Site, must be filed within one calendar year after such claim or cause of action arises, or forever be barred.

17. Modification of Terms of Service.
We reserve the right to change or modify these Terms of Use at any time and your continued use of this site will be conditioned upon the Terms of Use in force at the time of your use. You can always check the most current version of the Terms of Use at this page.

18. Termination.
We will have the right to terminate your access to the Web Site if we reasonably believe you have breached any of the terms and conditions of this TOS. Following termination, you will not be permitted to use the Web Site and we may, in our discretion, cancel any outstanding Product Orders. If your access to the Web Site is terminated, we reserve the right to exercise whatever means we deem necessary to prevent unauthorized access to the Web Site, including, but not limited to, technological barriers, IP mapping, and direct contact with your Internet Service Provider. This TOS will survive indefinitely unless and until we choose to terminate it, regardless of whether any account you open is terminated by you or us or if you have the right to access or use the Web Site.

19. Integration.
This TOS contains the entire understanding between you and us regarding the use of the Web Site, and supersedes all prior and contemporaneous agreements and understandings between you and us relating thereto.

20. Additional Terms.
This TOS will be binding upon each party hereto and its successors and permitted assigns, and governed by and construed in accordance with the laws of the State of Delaware without regard for conflict of law principles. This TOS and all of your rights and obligations under them may not be assignable or transferable by you without our prior written consent. No failure or delay by a party in exercising any right, power or privilege under this TOS will operate as a waiver thereof, nor will any single or partial exercise of any right, power or privilege preclude any other or further exercise thereof or the exercise of any other right, power, or privilege under this TOS. You are an independent contractor, and no agency, partnership, joint venture, or employee-employer relationship is intended or created by this TOS. The invalidity or unenforceability of any provision of this TOS will not affect the validity or enforceability of any other provision of this TOS, all of which will remain in full force and effect.

RESOLUTION AND ARBITRATION

1. Any dispute, controversy, damages or claim arising out of or relating in any way to the purchase or performance of the services from this site and any of its affiliates, including without limitation any dispute concerning the construction, validity, interpretation, enforceability or breach of the agreement, shall be exclusively resolved by binding arbitration upon a Partyâ€™s submission of the dispute to arbitration. [In the event of a dispute, controversy or claim arising out of or relating in any way to the agreement of all terms, the complaining Party shall notify the other Party in writing thereof. Within thirty (30) days of such notice, management level representatives of both Parties shall meet at an agreed location to attempt to resolve the dispute in good faith. Should the dispute not be resolved within thirty (30) days after such notice, the complaining Party shall seek remedies exclusively through arbitration.] The demand for arbitration shall be made within a reasonable time after the claim, dispute or other matter in question has arisen, and in no event shall it be made after two years from when the aggrieved party knew or should have known of the controversy, claim, dispute or breach.]

2. This agreement to arbitrate shall be specifically enforceable. A Party may apply to any court with jurisdiction for interim or conservatory relief, including without limitation a proceeding to compel arbitration.

3. The arbitration shall be conducted by one to three arbitrator[s]. If the Parties are not able to agree upon the selection of an arbitrator, within [twenty] days of commencement of an arbitration proceeding by service of a demand for arbitration, the arbitrator shall be selected by the American Arbitration Association or a federal court judge in Utah, shall select the arbitrator in accordance with the terms of this agreement. For three arbitrators, each party shall select an arbitrator within 10 days of commencement of the arbitration who shall serve as a neutral arbitrator and the two designated arbitrators shall select a third neutral arbitrator within 30 days of their selection if the parties cannot agree on a third arbitrator. If the two arbitrators cannot agree on selection of a third arbitrator within 30 days of their appointment, the American Arbitration Association or a federal judge in Utah shall select such arbitrator in accordance with the terms of this agreement.

4. The arbitrator[s] shall have 2 years of experience .

5. The arbitration shall be conducted in accordance with the then existing Commercial Rules of the American Arbitration Association.

6. The arbitration shall be conducted in a city in Utah County, Utah.

7. The laws of the State of Utah shall be applied in any arbitration proceedings, without regard to principles of conflict of laws.

8. It is the intent of the parties that, barring extraordinary circumstances, arbitration proceedings will be concluded within 240 days from the date the arbitrator[s] are appointed. The arbitrator[s] may extend this time limit in the interests of justice. Failure to adhere to this time limit shall not constitute a basis for challenging the award.

9. Except as may be required by law, neither a party nor its representatives may disclose the existence, content, or results of any arbitration hereunder without the prior written consent of all parties.

10. The Parties shall not be entitled to discovery.

11. The Parties shall exchange a copy of all exhibits for the arbitration hearing and shall identify each witness who will testify at the arbitration, with a summary of the anticipated testimony of such witness 30 days before the arbitration hearing.

12. The arbitrator[s] shall have no authority to award punitive, consequential, special or Indirect damages. The arbitrators shall not be entitled to issue injunctive and other equitable relief.

13. The cost of the arbitration proceeding and any proceeding in court to confirm or to vacate any arbitration award, as applicable (including, without limitation, reasonable attorneysâ€™ fees and costs), shall be borne by the unsuccessful party, as determined by the arbitrators, and shall be awarded as part of the arbitratorâ€™s award. It is specifically understood and agreed that any party may enforce any award rendered pursuant to the arbitration provisions of this Section by bringing suit in any court of competent jurisdiction. The parties agree that the arbitrator shall have authority to grant injunctive or other forms of equitable relief to any party. This Section shall survive the termination or cancellation of this Agreement.

14. Each party shall pay its own proportionate share of arbitrator fees and expenses [plus the fees and expenses of the arbitrator it designated (if there are three arbitrators] and the arbitration fees and expenses of the American Arbitration Association. The arbitrator[s] shall be entitled to award the foregoing arbitration and administrative fees and expenses as damages in his/her discretion.

See that? You just committed yourself to a monthly charge of $9.47 with YourTrimTrainer.com… something you never heard of, and would very easily overlook on your monthly statement. But like the Energizer bunny, those charges will keep coming, and coming, and coming, until you call that number to cancel… and you can be sure there is someone on the end of that line who is very good at getting more money out of you, or obfusticating your cancellation efforts.

The rest of the language in these Terms and Conditions (which you didn’t click on, because nobody ever does) is a lot of legal weasel words which absolve the company from any responsibility, specify that the product basically won’t give you any results, and which make it next to impossible to cancel your order or get a refund. Even if you manage to get the product back to them within the deadline, which given mailing times is very unlikely, you’ll still get charged $5.95 restocking fee per unit, which in the case of this order would be $30.00. So they get you coming, and they get you going, and all you can do is bend over, because here it comes again.

If you want to become more informed about the scum and the scams, read this article at The Atlantic about Jesse Willms, the Dark Lord of the Internet.

It’s the story of a supremely corrupt scammer, and how current hucksters are still using techniques that he perfected – it makes me wonder if he’s not involved in this very dishonest style of marketing. The article also provides an in-depth analysis of shady internet advertising, with an emphasis on diet and health products, and look at Google’s true raison d’être. And as this post points out, it’s still going on everywhere.

Be careful out there.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Why “Black Friday” is a truckload of camel ejecta

Posted on November 29, 2013 by The Old Wolf

I’ve always known it. With the exception of a few scarce loss-leaders on the front table at Staples, or the one or two flat-screen TV’s listed at a ridiculously low price at WalMart, the things people are disembowelling each other for could be had for the same price at other, much more peaceful, seasons.

An article in the Wall Street Journal talks about the dirty secret of “Black Friday” discounts:

The common assumption is that retailers stock up on goods and then mark down the ones that don’t sell, taking a hit to their profits. But that isn’t typically how it plays out. Instead, big retailers work backward with their suppliers to set starting prices that, after all the markdowns, will yield the profit margins they want. The red cardigan sweater with the ruffled neck on sale for more than 40% off at $39.99 was never meant to sell at its $68 starting price. It was designed with the discount built in.

Why this is not common knowledge by now is beyond me, other than the fact that most people get their educations from slanted news media and the National Enquirer.

The Week gives some more information in an article entitled Black Friday ads: 4 sneaky pricing tricks — and how to spot them The summary:

They mislead us on original prices (“Original Prices” are grossly inflated.)
They push derivative products (The wares they’re selling often aren’t the cream of the crop. These models are, unsurprisingly, unreliable and shoddy. Derivative products often have fewer features than comparable sets as well.)
They repeat deals from last year (90 percent of Black Friday ads from 2012 contained at least one of the exact same items selling at the exact same price as in 2011.)
They use rebates (Shoppers often forget to submit rebates — which is exactly why retailers love them.)

Each of these points comes with advice on how to beat the retailer at his own game, or at least make sure you’re not falling for the scams.

If you need a visual summary, I found this one over at reddit, courtesy of /u/guyinnova

Do yourselves a favor. Stay home on Black Thursday and Black Friday, shop on December 4th (or at other less-stressful times), and do your homework. You’ll save both money, stress, and possibly life and limb.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

To dream the impossible dream

Posted on November 23, 2013 by The Old Wolf

Growing up – or even being grown up – and dealing with body image issues is difficult enough in the absence of an impossible standard. Unfortunately for everyone, the advertising industry is responsible for holding up a zenith of beauty which is impossible for anyone to attain – even the beautiful models themselves.

The two shots below were captured from a video that shows model Sally Gifford Piper being photographed and then photoshopped.

This is the photo of Sally before the photoshop work was done. Yes, she’s had hair work and makeup and lighting for this shot, but she’s a beautiful woman just the same.

This is the “after” version – she’s been given body work and cosmetic surgery to give her Barbie proportions, something no human could ever hope to approximate.

Watch the process in the video below:

And as a followup, an interview with Piper herself, courtesy of CNN.

This reminds me of the Dove makeover video, that is worth watching at any time.

The advertisers should be ashamed of themselves for promoting such unattainable standards, but of course they won’t be, because the result is far too lucrative, at the expense of the self esteem of people everywhere – largely women and girls. The more exposure this kind of douchebaggery can get, the better off humanity will be.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Playing in the World Game

As One

Category Archives: Selling it

Packaging Snake Oil

There’s bad translation, and then there’s this.

Change Nothing, Sell More

An Especially Devious Spam Comment.

Fraud by Deception – Labor Regulatory Compliance Office

A day of my life is quite enough.

Spammer = Liar

Every Day with Rachael: Fraud, Spam, Scam

Why “Black Friday” is a truckload of camel ejecta

To dream the impossible dream